My Heart...

ok I am 24yrs old and have been w my boyfriend for 3 years, hes 32. for our first 2 years we both worked seasonally on a local party island and we had our drunken ups and downs but we are just so in love. everything was sooo amazing, I really mean my heart would beat so hard when he kissed me, but he went back for anothr summer and I stayed at home and worked..and well everything changed overnight, trust & jealously and things said that you cant tak back-pretty much everything a long distanc relationship is whn you are crazy about that person…he is now back and we took 2 weeks apart to evaluate everything becz the fights werent being resolved. over that 2 weeks he promsd to step up since hes been gone and promsd to treat me like a queen and I of course promsd the world and we got back togthr and its still edgy bt its like our sex is different…I guess im just feeling lost…im gonna be 25 soon and I feel like I could either keep going on trying to respark a flame that I want so bad but is just an emotional mind-f* or I cn be happy and just live my life..I want him to be the one but im having a hard time nt being cranky arnd him I dont know wht to do…I feel like im lost and exhausted w life and love…im writing on and on and still havnt evn written the whole story. im just exhausted