How can I help my friend who has just been told her father has a few weeks to live?

One of my best friend’s father has cancer. He was diagnosed a while ago. It went away and he got the all-clear. However, recently it came back. He has not been responding well to treatment and has just been let out of the hospital. Unfortunately, he has been told that nothing is working and all they can do is wait. They don’t know if he will live till christmas.

I’m really worried about my friend. When she told us she was laughing and crying at the same time and like me she clearly can’t handle her emotions properly. She said it hasn’t really hit her yet and she’s not ready for a funeral. I want to be there for her but at the same time I don’t want to be all patronising. I’m so worried about her as she’s a very, very clever girl. She’s applying to Cambridge University and we have exams in January and it’s going to hit her hard. What’s the best way of dealing with this?

Answer #1

Maybe you can just advise him/her to spend more quality time with her father or family while the time lasts. Ask him/her to be happy throughout these days and let the misery past.

Answer #2

Just be yourself - that is why you are good friends.

No need to to do anything special - friends tend to say and do the right thing naturally. She will probably need you to continue that natural personality now more than she ever has.

– Best wishes to you all - Majikthise.

Answer #3

Regarding her exams in January - it might be better if her tutors are aware of the stress she is likely to be under in case her work starts to deteriorate.

“Assessors” and “Moderators” are often able to take such things into account when recommending and approving Grades.

– Majikthise.

Answer #4

Be there for her, if she needs a listening ear. That’s the best thing any friend can do. When it hits her, she most likely will need you to be there for her a lot.

Answer #5

The only thing you can do is be there for her as she takes every step. I would advise u to tell her to make some sort of documentary right now. Like a video…something to remember as his last days. if he is capable of being clear & awake out of bed or in a wheel chair…to a park…a beach family time…just capture the good days rather then dwell on the bad days. have a party invite all of his friends…you dont need a reason…just to be thankful he is still around. Dont waste it by feeling sorry but instead celebrate the last days in joy & happiness. Smiling moments…even though it may hurt. It would be making him feel a bit better rather then lay still cooped up in a room staring at 4 walls, simply waiting to die.

Its a sad story, but all you can do is face reality & enjoy the time you do have left…so why waste it in tears…make it the best time of his life!

hope this helps. :(

Answer #6

hug her and dont let go

Answer #7

May be reading with her or him some verses from the Bible like Revelation 21:4, Isaiah 25:8…?

Answer #8

dude ur a moron (no offence) the bible wont solve it, just give better advice man please

Answer #9

be there for her, protect her now more than ever, help her spend as much time with him as possible and watever u do dont get her sad in these moments, ive been through this, its painful to have a loved one die like that… :(

Answer #10

Be there when she nedds it, give her space, and try to cheer her up and do things she likes. Tough but whith someone by her side she will make it trough.

Answer #11

be there for her til he dies and forever afterwards and all times beyond - Taylor -

Answer #12

Tell her how much you love her and will always be there ALWAYS and youll be like a sister

Answer #13

I know many people which were helped a great deal thanks to the Bible, including myself. Have you read yourself the quoted verses? If not you should give a try. Are very encouraging.

Answer #14

yeah but its still not helping man its a book, get over it (no offense…) and i will never live the bible, i dont believe in god that much, i only know he exists but i will not be going to church or anything… NO RELIGION RULES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Answer #15

TEARDROP :’’’’’(

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