I've dated this guy, junior for almost 4 years now...I recently broke it off with him because he doesn't take his own life seriously. He's into the "thug life". I think the whole thing is so damn immature but I love him, and i figured maybe if i broke up with him maybe he would see that he's losing me if he doesn't straighten up. I mean I'm always paying for EVERYTHING and he treats me like shit sometimes, he's even gotten a lil' physical on me before. I seriously CANNOT remember the last date he paid for ....or the last date we had at all. He's 22 years old and doesn't have a job....kinda a bum....but i have these feelings for him that i don't think will ever go away and i overlook all those flaws i know i have my flaws too but damn sometimes it's hard to name the reason why i fell in love with him in the first place. But when we are together i am the happiest ever. I just feel like he uses me sometimes and treats me like shit a lot. He satisfies me sexually....i don't think anyone else could ever live up to him that way...or maybe i just think it's so good cuz I'm in love with him. So we decided that we would be friends with benefits and it feels like we don't fight now....but i don't think he is taking this break up seriously now cuz i have sex with him either way.....i know i need to break it off i just can't seem to stop sleeping with him cuz i love him, and i don't want to sleep with anyone else. How do i make myself stop calling him for a damn booty call.....if i can do that he will see that im serious and want him to try to take care of himself. I guess he is getting best of both worlds here by not dating me, but still f*cking me. So he'll prolly neva straighten up now. im soooooo stupid, huh?
We all go through that i'm half way going through something like that now. You need to meet more male friends it sound like but, dont become a hoe but learn a women worth because the bible does say :he that find a wife findth himself a good thing" and I think it true. Some one told me just because you love someone does mean you ment to be with them and that also true. Let him go with consent "no strigs attacted" it want be easy but time heal all wounds. It ok to cry and cry as much as you need to hour by hour, minuted by minuted , day by day because crying mean accepting and every thing there is a season and all the pain is a reason it will make you wise someday. So don't give up and don't give in becausee it be ok. Thank about your self of Love You and please stop byeing him. cause the bible say a man that don't work don't eat
You know the answer to this, you're just are looking for someone to tell you what you already know... but what i say isn't going to change what you think... if you want to fix it you have to do this yourself! Ofcourse he is getting the best of both worlds, because he can sex you and then sex other girls on the side because you are not going out... you are not going to ever get over him until you drop him completely... i dont even think you can be friends because all he will want from you while you are hanging out is to sex it up... so you should really consider moving on and finding another to screw once so you can get your mind of him... because thats all this seems to be right now is sex attachement.... because how can your really love someone that treats you sh*tty?
Thats just my 2 cents!
You must live here in my area. The Bay Area. If your man is into the "Thug Life" as you put it then you made his day when you did the whole friends thing with benefits. Guys around here can make a living off of a girl (or sometimes girls) popcorn pimpin'. If you dig the guy you need to figure out if this life is right for you. If you want to go further in life and get the stable home with the good paychecks coming in and a man that isn't sagging his pants around his ankles telling your parents that they can "F" themselves, then you need to move on before he goes one further and manages to get a baby in you.
He treats you bad because YOU allow him to. You are showing him that you are insecure and very needy, and that you cant stand on your own two feet without him. Love isnt suppose to be one-sided. The longer you allow him to use you, the harder it will be to move on! You have to start respecting yourself before you will get respected! He doesnt want you back...why would he when he can have you anytime he wants!!!
Get rid of him or you'll find yourself in love by urself. Respect urself and have some self control, n get out there and find som1 who's gonna treat you right, whos gonna treat u like a woman should be treated.
i think you should just try to forget about him and not talk to him aolt and try new apportunirties