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Am I worth being saved?

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I hate myself, and I feel like everyone around me hates me. I have no friends and I've tried to end my life 8 times, but I have always "chickened out" or something ended up failing. I kind of want help, but I don't want my family to get even MORE overprotective if they found out that I tried all the things that I did. And uhh...like people automatically seem to think that if you are in counseling that you're some kind of a mental person (sry that didn't come out right). Well, the weird twist to this is...I don't think ANYONE can help me. But I wish someone could. But they're going to end up druggin' me up for depression or whatever. Are counselors USELESS? I mean...it's their JOB to care and if they weren't getting paid, then they WOULDN'T care! So really...no one DOES care! But why should they? I'm not even worth it! See? That's the battle I fight inside myself every night!
I just need help...I feel like I'm getting nowhere and I'm going to have a breakdown..