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What is the proper etiquette when a family member you are not close to is dying?

My family has always been known for being overly dramatic, and now my cousin is dying from cancer (she has only weeks left, if that), and of course, all the family is making it out like they are devastated by it. Yes, some are, but others are just doing it to be dramatic - they’ve never shown a moment’s attention for my cousin before she became ill. Myself - I’ve never been close to her…I’m hurting inside that she’s going to be gone soon, and I do feel remorse, but I don’t want to start pretending like the perfect cousin and sit by her deathbed in tears with the rest of the family. So how do I deal with this without coming off as fake or cold-hearted?

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Answer #1

I’ve been in this situation before, i often visited the family member in the hosptil not crying but just being there for him and her, (two situations i was in) i attented the funeral of course but i didnt cry, im not too much of a cryer when ppl die. i said all the expected to the other more close family members “im sorry for your loss, ill miss her too, and so on. hope i helped!

Answer #2

I believe in being real. I dont see the point in faking overly dramatic emotions or feelings. It would be polite to visit her (if you live close) and atleast spend a day or so with her before she passes and tell her you do love her before she is gone, but i see no reason to over exaggerate and make up emotions.

Answer #3

If I really do not know the person, think you would send a card to the member of the family or vist them and comfort them. I do not see any reason to visit a person you do not know.

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