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I wrote a poem...what do you think?
Desperate for the real The truth of all the lies Wanting just to feel To stop the constant cries
I scar my arm so deep With such a sharp idea Left silently to weep For showing is my fear
I deny that I am hurting From a pain to hard to bare I feel the world around me Its vastness does do scare
I close my eyes slowly And drift to another place I can’t be around those near me My fears I can not face
I start to think of all That I could do to die I think of my downfall My head I start to lye
Where’s the silver lining To this cloud so black I can’t find the meaning For my life is off a track
All is any’er-do-well There’s nothing to be done Flowers turn to hell My life is a re-run
I take another drink Of what shall bring me to rest Some thoughts I start to think This is for the best
I sought to find A final numb Peace in mind I begin to hum
For I am calm At last, at last I trace my palm Fade fast, fast
deep! Best original poem I’ve read :)
its good and really fluid it could be a song
I really like your poem it sounds great!!!
Wow. It’s amazing. I’m sure, me included, can relate to this at some point in their lives :) good job x
That is intense… it is very good although I hope that isnt how you really feel!
that was awsome and well written!!!
Thought that was excellent :)
this is good it is really well written nice work :]
wow. thanks guys.I didn’t think it was that good cause I just wrote it about howi feel but thanks. And thank you ml31093 for telling me my mistakes! haha I didn’t even notice thanks :) itssupposed to be any ‘er do well but everytime I typed it it came up any’er do well haha I don’t know why
whoa… that was really amazing!
- its supposed to be and e ‘ e are but I can’t type it as a full word cause it keeps changing it on me
*ugh screw it is isn’t working hahah its not the word that shows up hahah
thats amazing. you should pursue poetry as a career.
Wow…this is REALLY good. kind of chilling how deep and raw the pain is. I hope this isn’t what you really feel… There are a few gramatical errors like “my head I start to lye” that should be LIE, and no hyphen in rerun, and this phrase confuses me; “All is any’er-do-well” (please reply with an explination)… Hope I helped, please reply.
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