Home More advice Parents & Family
hey, im going to turn 16 in july and I will have finished skool by then and then will start college part time in september. my problem is I rele want a baby, I know your going to say im too young but I've felt the same way for a couple of years and I've even been doing bad at skool because all I can see in my life is having a baby.I've managed to pick up my grades and I have a great boyfriend who feels the same, he has a job and makes good money. the only thing is, my family wouldnt agree with it, my mum would be disappointed because shes pushed me to do well all my life, my dad doesnt liek me too much already and we always fight, so he'll kick me out and most of my family will abbandon me.
I am rele responsible, mature, I can cope with a baby, I've raised my cousin since he was born because my auntie got ill and couldnt look after him for 7 months and then I stayed wiht her to help her out afterwards hes 2 now, so im not new to all this.
what do you think I should do, follow my dreams of having a baby and be abbandoned from half my family or wait until they think im ready but be unhappy wiht my life until then.???
When young teens want a baby, its usually because they need to be loved. Bringing a baby into the world with no way of supporting it is selfish. Babies are expensive. Ttake time to grow up, and have fun. Party, hang out with your friends, wait until you are emotionally and financially stable enough to have a baby.
I hope you are smarter than you are desperate. There are so many years of fun waiting for you, if you'll just try to calm your hormones and seek out L I F E! Live it! You talk to any smart person, and they will advise you to wait as long as possible, at least until you are married and about 23, before you start to plan a pregnancy. They will also hope you want to help the world instead of causing more problems. Those who help the world do all they can to learn as much as possible, and become a contributing member of society. They find a smart man with a college degree and some goals in his life who wants to find and marry another smart woman and raise smart children.
Desperate young girls do stupid things, like going on facebook or myspace to find a 'boyfriend'. They post provocative photos to try to lure in handsome young men, who often turn out to be 40 year old pedophiles who like to tease girls like you into thinking they love you, and want to have a baby with you.
One out of every 150 boys born now has Autism. Are you prepared to handle a special needs child all by yourself, at the age of 16?
You can go online to find the costs, but it's the cost to your own childhood that is the largest. WANTING SOMETHING DOESN'T MAKE YOU READY. If you really want a baby, start now to do the things you need to do to provide it with a good life. Going ahead and having a baby when you haven't looked after providing a good nest FIRST, proves you aren't ready and worse, it suggests that having the baby is based on childish selfishness and immaturity. You have no idea about responsibility; paying rent and utilities, shopping for a family, car insurance, taxes, saving for education...the list goes on.
It takes more than $180,000 to raise a child. Working at or near minimum wage places you below the poverty level.
You want the love and laughter of a child, and someday you can realize that dream. But you cannot fathom the reponsibiblity of caring for another human being. You give up your desires, your freedom, your future.
I hope you spend some time recognizing the truth about yourself, and take steps to get help. If you just tell your high school counselor or a trusted teacher, he or she will be able to get you the help you need. You only have to ask for it. If they don't believe you, or try to pass it off as a joke, keep looking until you find someone you know who will take you seriously, because this is a serious issue, and you need more help than we can offer here.
I've wanted a baby since I was 13, im now 18 and engaged 2 a wounderful person, and he wants children too, I still want children but I've had a SERIOUS!! think about it, I want to finish my colege course and work with children and get a good job with good money coming in and my own place.The next best thing about not having a baby of your own is too work with children, and thats what I do, every1 said to me have you changed your mind, but I havnt, they are SERIOUS!! hard work, I have to be in my school placemnt for 8am I fin at 3.15, so I get 2 play with the children and do some things tthat a mother would do, change them if they have an accident etc but I love every second of it even if I have been weed on lol or been sick on I still love it as I've got older, I've started 2 go clubbing and partying every weekend and I can do what I want to do! the only thing I have 2 worrey about is my fiance, I dont have a time I have 2 b in etc, just think of all the good times you wil miss when you have a baby at such a young age? I can go clubbing and partying go to pubs stay out all weekend and not have 2 worey about a single thing! do you realy want 2 give your whole life up even before its began!? all the fun things you can do with out a child!? you wont b able 2 do all of them when you have a baby, my best mate has a child shes 1 now, and she cant go out clubbing etc and when she cums the pub with us an her mum babysits she has 2 b in by 11 so she can take care of her daughter and I hardly see my friend any more, so I think you should seriously wait until your a lot older and you have lived your life even before considering having children, in my eyes you should have your own!!! place!!! before having a baby, and should be able 2 provide for it!! they are seriously hard work!!
omfg. your effing dumb. you want to go to college? dont you want to like party or atleast drive around date guys , listen to music , take a walk whenever you want. its sooo selfish of you to have a baby. you have a baby for the baby not for you. dont you get that? you dont even have a place for urself . if you say you would love your child and you would want the best would you realy want a 16 year old girl raising you baby you love. dont you want the best for him or her? are u nuts. I've wanted a baby since I was 4 lol. most girls do. and I want to get married to. I realy do so hey I think im going to go find a guy at a gasstation tonight and get married cause I want to get married lol. it dosnt make sence. you do things when I ts rite. what the hell is wrong with u? I dont understand people who could be so selfish. I am 21 and have a baby now and its work. a lot of work and im one of the strongest people you will meet. dont deny your furute children of the best life possible you can profide for them. when you have a child you no longer exsits. you dont matter its the baby and thatit you live to be a parent thats all for the rest of your life. and you should be a lot older and have a husband you have known for years to help support you emotionly. belive me it sux not having that. and no whatever the hell your dateing now is going to last. I have a b/f in high school from 14-17 and like I grew up and he didnt. you never know. your brain isnt even done devloping yet how can you raise a humane being? not just a baby. imagine a baby then a todler then a 5 year old imagine if you will a 15 year old that comes to you and wants a baby lol. hopfully you wouldnt be that much of white trash you go along with that..
I would say wait a while. Having a kid is a big decision and you're only sixteen. It isn't like you are going to miss your chance, you have until you are about thirty five years old. Your really great boyfriend is just that, a boyfriend, wait until he commits enough to marry you. Do you have a house? You don't want to raise your kids in your parent's or his parent's house, that means that you will be raising the kid how they want to raise it. You said that you are going to college, what is that baby going to do during all your classes? Are you going to leave it home alone everyday, or with his parents? Do you really think that that would work? Your kid will probably feel more motherly affection from his mother than from you. And how does his mother feel about that? You also said that your boyfriend gets paid well. How well is well? 15, 20, 25 dollars an hour, that isn't enough to pay for food for three people, house payments, medical bills (what if this kid is born with a disease? Will you have time to take it to the doctor?Give it the special attention?), clothes, toys, books, computers, phones, furniture. I think that if you can do all that, ON YOUR OWN, without relying on other people, you are ready to have a kid. Even if your boyfriend's job does pay enough, what if he leaves you? Brian
Hello, I'd say follow your dreams. If you have a good man by your side, willing to help you, stay with you && support you and the baby then I'd say go for it. People always judge teen pregnancy especially a lot of older people, && I'm thinking because they wouldnt want that to happened to there son or daughter. there is many girls and guy young under the age of 18 that has concieved and make very well parents && do not depend on there parents for nothing. seems to me you have your life ready and you know what you want with it. you seeem mature and understanding and know a baby isnt a joke there is a lot that comes with him or her. so I'd say yes go for it.
Also I'm 16 years old and have been threw two miscarriages and they are tuff but if people judge you or if you want any advice or anything feel free to fun mail me. I come on here atleast once a day and I never leave anyone hanging..
hope I helped babydoll7
first off you should know that having a baby is a lot of work and takes up a lot of your time...basically you would no longer have a life and nothing would revolve around you...but I understand where your coming from because I want a lil boy right now and been wanting one for since 15...but just know that anything can happen if you do...your baby daddy can always walk out that door and leave you and the baby...just think on it some more and youll find the right answer for you
sorry I forgot somethinggsss. you love your family, im sure every young girl loves there family unless they go threw some tuff timese. if your family loves you like they say do. they will support you rather you have a baby or not.! your family is supposed to be by your side threw thick and thin. and you will go threw some tuff times during your pregnancy but in the end trust me it will all be worth it.
hope I helped again lol babydoll7
Ok, honestly.. I have to tell you to wait.. like you said with your cousin, your are NOT new to that.. but you will be new to that when it is your OWN child, your cousin most likely goes home and night, and leaves you, Im thinking you should wait untill your older, and your life is a little more defined, Im sorry but it is the truth... there is a time in life for everything, but now is not the time for children. :] good luck.
dont take advise from the white trash girl with cornrose in her hair lol. compare yourself to the best not the worst : p
Hmmm I remember when I wanted the same. I got my ex preg 3 times and she miscarriaged all three.
