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Why does my mom get mad when I date people out of my race and why does she think there all the same???
I think parents just like for their kids to stay within the "norm"... I mean when you get some age on you , you just tend to want things to be simple, easy and normal and I know that sounds stupid because people love to say "there is NO normal family, life aint like the cosby's" but you can't blame a parent for wanting simplicity and ease for their kid... interracial relationships aint easy even if your parents are cool with it... you've got a lot more than just parents in your life and who knows where problems could come from, friends, extended family, school and so on and so forth... I myself have 2 men in my life that are of another race and I love them both dearly, one that I will marry and one that is a very dear friend but right now non of us are around each other because of family issues that we've run into... and believe me it aint just white people that cause problems about it, the black families were just as hateful... but I'm old so I know with some time away when we all find each other again and our lives are without so much influence from other people we'll all be just as close as we were... don't give up on your relationships... know what you want and go get it and don't let anybody live your life for you but don't put yourself through stressful situations if it aint worth it ... your young and these problems will come and go just try not to get yourself into anything that'll cause you problems for years to come
and whoever said that about the black guys and drugs thing I'd just like to say... white boys do sell and do drugs too... and they bust a sag and tote guns and get in trouble and lead little teenage girls just as far astray as black boys...
somebody white people are going to stop allowing themselves to be scapegoats by saying things like that... stop making assumptions and you stop allowing people to blame their bad habits on their race or background :)
good luck anc... just chill it'll all be cool very soon... take it from someone old and wise lol
Your mom is probably scared because black tend to get in a lot of trouble than the average boy should. They are in gangs, sell drugs, skip school and they are big time cheaters. A lot of them have baby mama's and STD's are higher percentage than most communities.
So right now she is possibly looking at the negatives of black boys because they have so many but it's up to you to find the ones that aren't in that category. It's hard because there aren't many but if you really want to date a black guy then you'll do whatever it takes to prove to her that not every guy is like that.
If I were you talk to a couple of guys that are involved in clubs and organizations there are a lot of them that do work and are actually doing something productive with their life.
Also you have to have game girl! Let's say that there is a guy that you like but he has all those negatives, you need to learn how to sweet talk him, truthfully always stay truthful when you are doing that. Be sexy and ask him things like what do you want to do with your life, do you plan on going to college, are your mom and dad together [9 times out of ten they will say "no" but be careful because the guys that don't have their father in their life tend to be abusive] If they don't still communicate with them but keep an eye on them because they can change in a flash.
It's going to be a hard journey but give it time and just talk to them don't try and rush into a relationship with someone until you see their true colors. If you want more just message or comment me and I'll do what I can!
wow, racism NEVER ends. No matter how you put it, most of you are being VERY racist. I mean how can you say that it is NOT okay to date African Americans?? If that is the case, she should also warn you NOT to go to the tanning bed.. why?? because this changes the color or your pretty white skin. PATHETIC. how can anyone say anything about race when the SUN naturally changes the color of your skin. This is like me saying the white people are bad.. and this is why the sun is killing them off... one by one. Nobody has the right to be racist and after everything weve been through, I cant believe people still think this way.
And to chiffton: If you wanna go into statistics.. did you know that most pedofiles and molestors are middle aged white men.. So would you rather have your child dating a black gang banger.. or a white child molestor??
And to eurp: You must be crazy to think the white girls are "SIMPLY" more beautiful. Have you taken a look around?? The most beautiful race is the mixed one.And the comment you made about Brazilian girls was ridiculous, Brazilian girls are gorgeous... BUT THEY ARENT WHITE, they are mostly dark skinned.. and if ANYONE went to Brazil and went for the akward white girl, they are CRAZY. Dont get me wrong, my mother is white, but she is DAMN sure no where near brazilian.
xoxo
To listen:
"thats not true blacks are not the average ones getting into trouble or in gangs, sell drugs ect. I dont agree with that at all."
I said that black guys tend to get into a tad bit more trouble than the average boy should , which means that I am NOT saying the average boy gets into gangs, sell drugs, etc; just saying that they do more than they should.
To saucybaby:
I am not stereotyping black people whatsoever, and if you actually read what I said further along in my answer then you would see that I said "talk to a couple of guys that are involved in clubs and organizations there are a lot of them that do work and are actually doing something productive with their life." because yes there are tons that are not like that. But 75% of the time everything that I said was true. Do not be mad at the truth.
To blerggher:
Your comment sounds like a "Yo Momma" joke. Learn how to disagree with someone using real grammar and complete sentences. I am not ignorant but if telling the truth means that I am then so be it. For you to sit there behind your computer criticizing my answer and me is completely pathetic, if I am so ignorant why didn't you provide an answer to the question? At least I had enough guts to speak my mind and acknowledge reality.
YAH YA YAH YAH WE ARE NOT BLACK OR ARE WE AFRICAN AMERICAN WE ARE THE BROWN PEOPLE and you GUYS ARE NOT WHITE MORE OF A PALE PEACH O AN APRICOT I AM GETTIN SICK AND TIRED OF ALL THIS STERO TYPE SH!T YOUR MOTHER PROBALLY DOESNT WANT YOU TO BE WITH A BROWN PERSON (NOT BLACKS HOW WOULD you LIKE IT IF I CALLED you WHITES OR TANNIES DAMN) BECAUSE BROWN PEOPLE MOST LIKELY LIKE TO HAVE MORE THAN ONE GIRLFRIEND OR BOYFRIEND BUT YOU JUST HAVE TO GO WITH YOUR HEART and TRUST ME HUNNY WE ARE NOT ALL THE SAME DUMB PEOPLE. MOST BROWN PEOPLE ARE VERY SMART WE COULD BE VERY RICH AND HAVE GREATER JOBS IF IT WASNT FOR RACISM. PEACH/APRICOT LOL GUYS ARE SO SWEET SO ARE US BROWNIES LOL BUT WE ARE NO WHERE NEAR THE SAME. JAPANESE CHINESE ARAB MUSLIM CAUCASION SORRY IF I SPELLED IT WRONG OUR ALL DIFFERENT BUT LOOK WE ARE ALL THE SAME PEOPLE EXCEPT THAT ARE SKIN ABSOARBS DIFFERENT AMOUNTS OF SUN. PS IF YOU HATE US BROWNIES SO MUCH QUIT TANNING YOURSELVES BEFORE YOU GET CANCER and I HAVE A WHITE BOYFRIEND HE PLEASES ME and THE BEST WAYS HIS MOM DONT LIKE ME BUT OWELL THAT DOESNT STOP US FROM OUR LOVE SO you DO THE SAME LOVE WHO you LOVE WHO CARES WHAT YOUR MOM SAY ILY :)
Chiffon1516 what the fuck ? Your a spa ,, that's just ignorant . . You don't judge your personality on what colour you are . . How retarded are you ? . . Black people don't just cause trouble ? Where ever you got that shit from you clearly didn't think about it properly . . And you got it all wrong . . It's certain countries that people Are from may cause more trouble because of there backround ,, nothing to do with colour ,, just a majority of these countries are black . . But a black person living in England or Ireland or America would be the exact same as anyone else living there and would only cause as much trouble as the average person . .
Now for the question ,, well your mom is wrong and you have to explain to her what I just explained above ,, if this boyfriend (either black or white) is from a country with a lot of war , crime , violence and not many laws well then yes she has a right to be worried but just because of his colour no ? It's the inside that counts anyway . .
It depends on how old your mom is. The older white (christian) adults are a lot less open minded than people today. She may just choose to see the negative side to the black community, and she may have been taught by her parents that all black people are good for is raping white girls and robbing banks.
It's not your fault you want to date black boys. Some of them are REALLY sweet. But if you still feel confused: you should look at how your mother treats everybody out of her race. And then it should be obvious she is prejudice (if it is a negative reaction) and you shouldnt think she is attacking you and doesn't love you. It's your choice, you can explain that to her, to date whom you want to date; and while you want to have your mothers love, you shouldn't have her opinions blocking your chance at finding real love.
(PS-truthfully, if she doesn't like it now, she will NEVER approve)
My sister dated black guys and recently married a black guy. I don't like the idea of mixing race I personally feel that there is a reason for so many races and when we mix you arte killing out that race, for they are not 100% . My mom is white and my dad is hispanic & I have never thought it was right. My sister was engageed twice and both those fools she was with cheated on her and one of them gave her a STD. Another reason your mom my have a problem with it is that you got to think what would your kids go through if you ever had a mixed child. My sister and I went through a lot of name calling,and fights. I'm with a hispanic man because that is what my dad is and my son knows,who is 18, that he is to ONLY consider a hispanic woman for a girlfriend/wife.I'm correcting what my parents done wrong. God made these races so why would we want to alter HIS work...mmm
Ah, my parents confronted me about that. They told me I shouldn't date Muslims/Arabs/Blacks because they're all the same. I was like "Okay" but secretly, I love my girlfriend and she's a Muslim. I'm a Jew.
Personally, I don't see a problem with interracial/inter-religious relationships. The only time I see a problem is when it's personal. I am not racist, I'm Russian. xD We hate everyone. I meet Russians who tease me because I'm not 100% Russian[Moldovan-Uzbek].
Basically, there is no problem with this. Your mom is just believing the media. The media tells her that Arabs are bad, all they do is scream "For Allah!" and black people just participate in gangs. Maybe it's to fit in?
"Your mom is probably scared because black tend to get in a lot of trouble than the average boy should. They are in gangs, sell drugs, skip school and they are big time cheaters. A lot of them have baby mama's and STD's are higher percentage than most communities."
FYI
That is a stereotypical statement..You didn't say some blacks, most blacks or the men I know or anything like that...You said "blacks tend to get in a lot of trouble..." So basically you were generalizing all of them. If you say further down that they are actually working, are productive and doing something with their lives then you are contradicting yourself.
And that was my point.
guys get over it, your racist family better starting act like adult, tell mom they are not teenage no more. if a guy is racist it mean I wanna prove how gay he can be. I love chiffon1516' and mstar07 you guys rock in here. I m agree with you. and you canykissess, when you wanna say God, please next time look at him first okay, you say God made people not to what? you mean each race need to stay on they own, you mean church need to be divided by color? do you know racism hurt deep like some come home and kill your all family in your own eyes it make a person cry,
I am caucacian and I just read something that said black guys get in more trouble than white guy?
well that is just wrong. your mom is either rascist or worried because even though there is nothing wrong with a different race relationship, there are some ssick people still out there that will give you dirty looks, rude comments, some people might not serve you at place(even though it illigal) but if its love stay strong. you are not doing anything wrong no matter what people say. what you are doing is right because you are staying true to yourself
Truly I wish I knew how to help you here too. My dad is racist and all and he thinks that there is something wrong with inter-racial uh boy friend and girl friend uh ism well whatever. Ya get my point but I had a boyfriend that was black and first of all I'm not even spose to have a boyfriend at all but because we couldn't be open about it he left me rather just stopped talking to me but my point is be persistant and if that doesn't work be secret theirs no real changing peoples minds once they've made up their list of beliefs
Most black dudes get in more trouble then they should and im black soo I know.I think shes just trying to protect you from getting hurt.But what if you end up falling love with a black guy?Right now she doesnt LIKE you going out with black dudes and if you fall in love with a black dude then what?SHELL GO CRAZY so this is not the best advice,but I would sneak or try to get her to see it your way.Hope I helped :)I know its the best advice to sneak but when have we EVER listen to our parents like seriously?!?!:0
Many successfull blacks date white girls. Why? Because white girls are simply more beautyful.
But is not only about beauty but also about social issues. In brazil blacks want to date white girls to have mixed descendants. Among blacks it is called "amelhorar a raza" which means: Improve the race.
I think white woman who date black men are sexually not satisfied and black men who date white girls have simply a complex.
Why else would they date?
Racism is about fear and ignorance. That's all. Your mom saying they're all the same is ignorant. Sorry, but that's the truth. She may be a smart person, but ignorant about some things and this is one of them.
Black is beautiful. (Hello? Anybody else remember that phrase??) But please don't make a fetish about dating black or even non-caucasian boys because there's something racist about that too. We need to love for the right reasons.
There is one common denomenator in almost every single relationship involving a hot white girl (espec. blond), and a black guy: The girls have a dysfunctional relationship with their fathers, and they have very low self esteem. This is documented in Emperical research within three major cities, New York, Los Angeles, Detroit.
Well said, marbles. That is exactly what I was trying to say. Don't make a habit of dating only Black or only Arabs. We love for certain reasons.
I love my girlfriend not that she's Muslim, but that she and I love each other more than anything, and no one's opinion will change your feelings for a person.
just because your BLAK IT D0ESNT MAK3 you A TROUBL3 MAK3R J3WS SKIPP SCH00L S3LL DRUGS WIT3S D00 AND CHIN3S3 D00 ITS N0T A RACIAL SITUATION ITS ABOUT OUR YOOTH MAKIN BAD DESCISIONS WH00Z FAULT IS THAT N0T BLAKK people AND WHAT TH3Y DOO DO3SNT MAK3 TH3M BAD ITS TH3 D3SCISIONS THAYY MAK3 THAT AR3 BAD
Your mom grew up during an era of prejudice it is the ignorance which is attached to it that is making her think that way...all you can go is pray for her and raise your children to appreciate all good people.
Some people are so stupid. There good apples and bad apples in every basket of apples, has nothing to do with if it's a basket of Gala, Granny Smith, Braeburn, Red Delicious, etc...y'all feel me???
if you look at it all races are in gangs an in trouble its not just black guys some of them have really good heart an you cant judge a person by there coloer because there not all the same
Your mom is racist, it is a pity...but you are not, it is wonderful. Just love someone you really love...she'll understand you and your boyfriend someday.
Chiffon1516 is a ignorant. and the messed up thing is she is so ignorant she don't even realize how dumb that is. and she even appears to be black WTF
thats not true blacks are not the average ones getting into trouble or in gangs, sell drugs ect. I dont agree with that at all.
that was supposed to say SOMEDAY WHITE PEOPLE are going to stop allowing themselves to be scapegoats
ooops :)
Yall dont get me wrong my mom isnt predidest or whatever I like both black and white so please dont arguie
Chiffon1516 you are definitely stereotyping black people and you're wrong. I too don't agree with you.
because thinks you should be with your own race and yes all guys are all the same in my book
because lots of black people deal drugs and stuff and they make a bad name for the rest
you guys are al raciest... white people can get into that stuff too...
cops+dogs+blacks= the 60's lol
go shedabeast!
