Soz it big but its a long story(and sad one)how do I stop crying???

I'm 15 and for my work experience 2 months ago I went to a residential home for the elderly where my auntie works. The 2 weeks I was there I really liked it and I sat with one person everyday and talked to her. But she got poorly and I went to visit her to make sure she was ok and look after her a bit because they are very busy down there. I know its disgusting but she was sick everytime she eat or drank owt. And when I was there I was giving her a drink to see if she could keep it down and holding the cardboard bowl if she could. Combing her hair. Stroking her hair when she felt ill, painting her nails for her. And she lost her glasses and I was looking 4 them all day till she found them in her bag!! She went into hospital about a month ago so I didn't go down for a bit to give her chance to get better in hospital and I thought a month would be enough. But I went to visit my auntie last night and I said to her do you know whether mary is out of hospital?? And she sed oh mary died last thursday she doesn't know what of. But I got so used to seeing her it feels like a bit of me is missing.and I can't stop crying. It has been 14 hours since I was told and I'm still crying. And I couldn't sleep either(I'm in uk so its 7:25am). I'm just sooo upset and I don't know what to do with myself. I just keep thinking of her face all the time. And when I try to do something to take my mind of her it just comes back to her. Like I was watching coronation street and mily came on and she look similar to mary with a diff hair colour. Mary was in her 90s so I knew it could happen soon but I thought I'd have a bit more time to spend with her. I just don't know what to do.I can't think staraight. I haven't eaten, haven't drunk anything, slept, or spoke to anyone just my auntie.how do I stop myself from crying at everything that reminds me of mary!???