Hi i’m a mother of one and 33.
I’m in a really difficult situation which started a couple of days ago. It arose after play wrestling with my 10 year old son, who’s a big wrestling fan. Having recently moved house and school he spends much of his free time with me and as such likes to play wrestle with me. When we last wrestled he asked me to put him in a bodyscissor hold to see if he could escape. This at the time seemed totally innocent as we play similar games often, so I put him in this hold where you wrap your legs around your opponents tummy and squeeze with your thighs. I did this till he gave up we went on wrestling. Later he asked me to put him in a headscissor (like above but thighs around head) again after some squeezing he gave up and we then finished playing.
Now my dilemma. The next day while checking the history on my computer I find that he has been searching these holds and looking at some sexually inappropriate material relating to those wrestling holds. After seeing what he has looked at online I feel I may have made a big error in judgement in putting him in any kind of scissor hold as I possibly inadvertently indulged him in some kind of fetish!
I have not yet approached the subject with him. But he has subsequently asked me to put him in another scissorhold. I refused under the premise of being to busy to play, but this wont do forever.
Is there any way of stopping him looking at such inappropriate material? One problem I am having is as there is often no nudity on such sites they are not picked up on parental filters and much of the material is on popular video websites.
However my main problem stems from my son wanting me to put him in a wrestling hold that could have sexual connotations. I am very good at applying this hold as I have very strong thighs, and it is one of the few wrestling holds safe enough to apply at home that I can make him give up in. This makes our play wrestling a lot more fun, particularly for him. So with this in mind it would be a shame not to use it if its not going to cause any sexual confusion.
Should I talk to him about it? Should I continue to play wrestle with him in the same way? Is it ok for a mother to apply such a hold to her son?
Any help would be much appreciated
WEll, not to frighten you, but when I was very young, six or so perhaps, my mom and I used to play wrestle and she scissored me playfully a couple of times and that was it. Until around puberty, then I couldn't get the thought of being scissored by girls out of my head, and it's become my lifelong fetish. It's not a bad fetish, it's fun and can be sexy with the right woman, but at that age, it's not entirely appropriate. I'm not saying he'll develop a fetish about being scissored, but he may. Best to stop it now and not contribute to it. It's ok to be scissored, or fantasize about being scissored by other girls, women, etc., but not your mom. So just don't do it anymore and if you're up for it, talk to him about it in a non-threatening, calm manner, don't make him shameful or anything, just make it conversational. If he feels total embarassment and shame over his attraction to scissors and female legs, it could drive the urge so deeply it'll screw him up totally. Just be up front, honest and calm about it..
At 10 years old, he is starting to really understand some things we, as mothers, wish the kids wouldn't.
Sit him down in front of the computer and pull up these sites you found. Take the time to explain to him the difference between what it is the two of you are doing and what he is seeing there, and make sure he understands that those sites are showing very inappropriate things.
It's important to keep the lines of communication open, especially now that he's getting to the age where curiosity is kicking in.
well I think you should explain to him that you cant do those moves with him and that you dont want him looking up those types of things but you can still wrestle with him but if you kech him toughing your breast or any other areas like such you need to say that you need to get back to work and that you will play other games like bord games or watch tv together
If he's old enough to be doing searches, he's old enough to hear that he's too big a boy to be horsing around with mom. enroll him in some classes with boys his own age. let them wrestle it out til he's got the urge out of his system. if this is something sexual for him, that should redirect his thinking ,don't you think?
it v]could be a mis understanding maybe he googled it and when to the wrong websites but then again it cud be what you expect maybe you shud juss talk to him about it but make sure he know your not mad
YES TALK TO HIM ABOUT IT AND HES GROWING UP SOONER OR LATER YOUR GUNNA HAVE TO DO IT YOU SHOULD JUST TALK TO HIM HONESTLY
im a 13 year old I thank it ok because I wrestle but you need to confront him about the computer stuff
