Why do people say I'm too nice?

I think sometimes it’s because it makes some people feel guilty for the way they treat you. Is your boyfriend always as nice to you as you are to him? Or does he get angry in situations that you wouldn’t? If he does, it could be that.

Another reason is because some want to protect you. I mean.. I got told last week by my sister that I’m too nice too. I get pushed around a lot and I just brush it off because I don’t want to make things worse, you know? But her reason for saying it was that if I let people be rude to me, they’d just keep doing it. No one deserves to be walked all over, I suppose.

In any case, just do what makes you happy. If there are some situations that really hurt you, don’t walk away from them.

I’d go mostly with Simplychallenging’s second suggestion. I’ve always been exactly the same way. Too nice, don’t know how to say no nicely, so I don’t say no at all, I get walked all over all the time. But allowing to to happy all to time just made me more and more cynical as time went on. I say, while it still makes you happy to be so nice and helpful, start being a little more selective. There are certain people that, time and time again, will use you and not care about what it does to you. It could be as small as teaching someone to say, “thank you,” or teaching them that they have to do their own homework, or teaching them that you’re not a doormat, and no, you won’t do the entire project just because you’re the only one with the right computer program. It’s a wonderful thing knowing how to be nice, a lot of people don’t, surprisingly enough. But not being careful about who you’re overly nice to could eventually ruin your outlook and transform you into someone that can’t be nice to anyone out of fear of being used. Uughh rant. But I hope you get the gyst.

It all depends on the nice they are talking about. Some people tell you that you are too nice because people can take advantage of you, there is a nice point where you should put a stop to it because it can hurt you. Then there is the kind of nice that people are not appriciated of, they don’t like you being nice because that means everybody likes you and stuff like that, sometimes they even think your a fake. Sometimes they stop and think and they say ( like simplychallenching said) they feel bad that they have been treating you a certain way because you don’t say nothing back and they are like ‘ that was kinda mean of me’

I tottally understand what your problem is here, i get this a lot … i think there are a lot of poeple who dn’t trust others so just be yourself and in time they will realise your only being you! x

Probably because you allow people to get away with more than they think they should. And they feel guilty about it. I know what you mean, like if I really dont care where i’m going to eat, i’d rather just go somewhere where other people are happy, but I think people feel bad about things like that. All relationships work on a give and take. When people feel like they’re taking more than they’re giving, they’re not comfortable and they’re not happy. Maybe start voicing your wants a little more. Just like it makes you happy to be nice and make others happy, maybe giving other people that opportunity to feel good about themselves will help?