How can I make my 21-year-old son less violent?

My daughter went thre that stage its a very hard stage…I tried the time outs and so on and it didn’t work…Then one day I caught her swearing… so I put some paprika pepper on her tounge she Hated it so far I been using it for all diff things and its been working. I talked to my doctor about it and she said its just fine, if it goes in food that its ok. You can give it a try its up to you, good luck

Never use a negative tone. Like say “Kepp your hands to yourself” instead of “Stop hitting.” children do not understand negative tones. You must follow through on any punishment given. If you say keep your hands to yourself or you’ll get time out, you must do it the very next time he hits you. Same goes with all the rest of the misbehaving he’s doing. Children also don’t understand the meaning of “Nice” or “Mean.” You must teach them right from wrong, not what’s nice and mean. If you need more info on this, I’d be glad to help. Good Luck!! ^_^

It sounds like he’s testing his boundaries. Try removing him from the situation when he start hitting the other children. Take hit and sit with him look into his eyes and tell him that if he want’s to hit, he’ll just have to sit by himself. Tell him if he wants to play with the other kids he has to be nice. You said, hitting him back made him hit you and it just went back and forth…I feel that ‘showing a child what it feels like’ just makes them think its ok to hit because you did it to them, so try taking his hands and holding them down to his sides if he tries hitting you or someone else…restrain him to make him stop.

Be stern when telling him to ‘stop hitting, it’s not nice’. Do it EVERY time he smacks or climbs on anyone. I’m sure you do this, just make sure you don’t let him go about playing. Take him for a ‘time out’ and sit with him, like I said before, until he decides to play nice. Keep removing him until he gets it! And if he tries getting up, be sure to keep sitting him down while explaining why he can’t play right now. Use as little words as you can to make it simple for him to understand.

You do NOT hit Be nice or no playing

Also, use your facial expressions when correcting him to let him know that you’re not happy. Eventually, the looks you give while correcting him can be used as a warning before he gets out of line while playing with others.

Hope that helps you out a little :) Jess