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How to deal with a verbally abusive father when mother won't get a divorce?

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He's horrible.
I was sobbing last night because of the way they were fighting, and hyperventalating. I can't deal with his crap anymore, I can't do it. I want them to split..I feel I'll never be able to have a good relationship with anyone because I'm afraid they'll be like him, and I already have bad self esteen and horrible confidence, and I am CONSTANTLY worrying about things like, 'what if he hurts my dog/cat? What if he hits mom? What if he beats the animals? WHat if he calls the cops and lies, and they have to take the animals away?"

I just don't know what to do anymore. I mean, I fall asleep worrying, I wake up worrying and it's ruining my life. If I talk to a counseler, I'd break down. Mom would hate me if I called somebody... help.