More Art, Writing & Literature Questions

What do you think of this poem?

This poem is a bit different to my usual style, it is a freewrite, where I let it flow. It almost doesn’t seem like a poem to me, it is so unfamiliar. This is my first attempt at this type of poem. Can you give my your opinions on it? It is titled “Never Be”

I dream of a world where there is no hate, A place I can escape, A place to dream, A place to give in to. There is no danger, Yet I feel uneasy. This world does not seem real, somehow. I am waiting for the mistrust that will never come, The hate that will never arrive. This world is good, pure, beautiful. Filled with flowers, nature, and peace. Then why do I feel so uneasy? This world makes a sound, A sickly sweet sound, A sound of uneasiness in my opinion, But why is it so uneasy? Why, I ask? Because this world cannot be real, It is a dream, I will never feel comfortable. I will never be.

Thanks for reading, Britz.

Become an Expert →

Answer #1

Thankyou, underwaterophelia, you are the first one that has given me critism. Once more, it was constructive! I am glad you have. It shows that I can recieve that. How exactly can I change it to improve it? I do not mean ANY offence to the other people who have answered, I am glad you answered. But any tiny little thing helps. Thankyou, Britz

Answer #2

U are so nice and you got a gift of writing I really wish you could end up being an author.Hey well you never no. you are so nice bye!

Answer #3

well its great but I think it needs more sparkle words Bye I love it still

Answer #4

O.O I love it!

Answer #5

:) Thankyou. Thankyou. I am glad to find support on this site.

Answer #6

omg its beautiful

Answer #7

wow it is good and you can imagine it sounds perfect

Answer #8

WOW I LOVE IT MAKES ME FILL HAPPY FOR A FEW SECS LOL!!!

Answer #9

I have to be honest with you, I’m not crazy about it. I don’t think it’s terrible, but it needs some improvement. The problem with it is it’s too obvious, and isn’t very poetic at all. What’s more, it’s very cliche.

More Like This

I want to leave a poem - 1 Answers
I want to leave a poem for people to , tell me what they think
What do you think of my poem? - 1 Answers
I had to right it for English class, I enjoy writing it now lol. This is deep, something you want to keep, you would even go ...
What do you think of my new poem? - 4 Answers
I hope that one day you will see it my way. Till that day, you see it the unclear way For love is hard to give without taking...
Do you think that Lenore from the poem "Lenore" is the same Lenore from The Raven? - 1 Answers
I mean both were written by Edgar Allan Poe, but i wonder if he means about the same girl or not or its just a coincidence. W...
What do ya think about this poem? - 1 Answers
'when I am in his arms im in heaven When I lean into his kiss nothing else matters When I look into his eyes every thing is p...
What do you think of this poem? - 5 Answers
I loved her I cared for her she was my true love she was everything to me evedentaly I was nothing to her she used me a...
What do you think? I wrote a poem! - 4 Answers
I made up a poem, tell me what you think: Willow tree, willow tree why are you so sad? She is no longer sitting on your bran...
What do you think of this poem good or no? - 4 Answers
Before I put the poem down I would like to say. It not weird for a boy to make a poem ( I think :d). And this is the first on...
What you think of my new poem? - 5 Answers
I promised I would always love you , you promised you would always love me I promised I would never let go , you promised you...
what do you think of my poem?? - 2 Answers
what do you think of my poem?? I just started to write occasionly please tell me if you hate it!!! CLOT I am this way and yet...

Ask an advisor one-on-one!

What do you think of this poem?

Diamond Nail Supplies

KitabDeal.com

Shopnobilap

Silverhints

Great-Essays.com