How to bring my secret son to this country?

I agree totally with texaskimmie,put your son first and seriously dont care what people have to say about you,they didunt have to live your life,your son should be too important then these people to worry about it

Well, to tell you the truth, I wouldn’t care what anyone thought. Why would you be embarrassed? Have you never talked about him to anyone in the US? If not, you should not only be embarrassed, but ashamed of yourself. Who cares if anyone judges you, this is your SON, someone who you should want with you and love no matter what anyone else thinks. If they don’t like it, they aren’t real friends. I think most people will embrace him and will treat him great. If not, kick them to the curb and find new friends. But DO bring your son over and treat him like a king. He deserves it after all this time. Good luck.

well I would send him pictures and stuff of some people that he don’t know and write him a letter or call him telling him all about those people but being embrassed thaat part is a toughie

Okay. So I can see where you are having some difficulty. First off, having a child at 14 is a pretty sticky situation anyway… Going through all the responsibilities a parent goes through at such a young age is life-changing. On top of that, leaving your home country to go to a new one would overwhelm me like, buttloads. lol. If your like me, a lot of huge changes all at once is just so stressful and overwhelming. Leaving your kid behind was such a hard thing to do, I’m sure. But re-introducing him back into your life now is going to be even harder. You’ve obviously had a not-so-average childhood, whether it was tough or not (probably was). So you have had a lot of life-experience, more than any girl I know. This being said, you probably should’nt worry so much about what other people think about you as much as you should consider the transition it will be for your son, especially if you never really spent much time with him. Much like you had to do, He will be leaving his country and everything he knew behind to start over with his mother who he doesn’t know as much as he could. (if you really know him at all)

Anyways, if you have not told your family already, it would be wise to get your family together, (ones that you feel close to and the people that will be meeting your son for the first time) and discuss basically what going on. Just prepare them for what’s about to happen. Talk to them, you know, maybe a little bit about your son, what he’s like, and how you feel about this situation. Tell them about how important it is for you to introduce him back into your life. Let your family know that their support is going to be helpful. The best way to bring a child into your life is with love, and a family that cares. Avoid arguements with your family when you bring this to light, and just try to keep everything calm. If someone has something to say that makes you feel uncomfortable at all, just ignore that comment. You need as much emotional strength as possible to get through this, so its crucial that you don’t let anyone bring you down. If all else fails and your family for some reason rejects your son or just doesn’t want to get involved, do NOT ditch your son. Stay by him, and do what it takes to be a good parent. All that matters is whats okay in YOUR eyes. Do what you need to be happy, and do what you must for your son.

I really really hope you get through this alright, and I hope that everything turns out okay, and that everyone will be happy, especially you.

Sincerely, Tinsley

dont you think its a lil late?I mean your son is what 12 or 13?ask him if he wants to come live with you hes old enough to decide.