Funadvice Logo
Explore Join
More Art, Writing & Literature Questions

Is this poem too dark?

With my frozen lashes and my pale skin, I knock, I bang, but no one lets me in. The snow is ice, it freezes my heart, it touches my lips, they curl apart. My teeth chatter, the wind howls. Your lights are bright, but your window’s down. Everyday I work, every night I cry. Until my fingers are numb and my eyes run dry. I use to be warm, fed and dry. A family we were, a family was mine. Then tossed aside into the cold for a new born babe has taken my bowl. Taken my spoon, taken my bread, taken my clothes, taken my bed. And I sit outside, almost lame. Thrown away once again. Replaced by a little one, rosy and fair. Eyes are wet as I jealously stare.

Become an Expert →
Answer #1

There’s no such thing as “too dark” when it comes to poetry. Dark - yes, perhaps, but poetry is an extension of your emotion, an insight into your mind, and if this is what your mind speaks, then all you are doing is putting it into words. Nobody can say poetry is “too” dark, or “too” sad, or “too” anything….poetry is what it is - feelings unbounded. Well written, by the way.

Answer #2

thats such a nice poem

Answer #3

No. Very expressive & that’s what poetry is about. Its a really good poem. I really enjoyed reading it. :)

Answer #4

Not at all! It was amazing!

Answer #5

Not too dark. It has lots of feeling and some striking statements. Needs some more editing but great images. Keep writing.

More Like This
Ask an advisor one-on-one!
Advisor

Diamond Nail Supplies

Nail Supplies, Beauty Essentials, Salon Equipment

Advisor

Shopnobilap

Literature, Online Publishing, Community

Advisor

Silverhints

Poetry, Shayari, Ghazal