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I could use a good reason not to

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I know this sounds pathetic and all, but I need a good reason to stop thinking about sleeping forever. My so called friend is really mad at me and de won't even look at meI don't no y, and I've been there though everything with her and I guess I'm just really :hurt that she's so selfish she went out with my ex not caring how much he ment to me. My ex keeps tellinge he loves me, and then asks my "friend" out again. I feel like crap (o wait, that because I am!)all the time, and I'm not good enough for anyone. I just want it to end you no?