How can I fix my relationship?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years and everything has been wonderful. A few months ago, we were having a rough patch and took a break for a couple weeks. during this break someone that i used to be really good friends with saw me in a parking lot and called me over to his car, in the middle of our conversation he kissed me. I didn’t kiss back, I don’t think i did anything to provoke it, it just happened. I told my bf because I didn’t want to keep secrets between us. He almost broke up with me, but we ended up staying together, but since then I have felt like he doesn’t trust me as much as he used to, he doesn’t treat me the same. We were moving along from that until the other day when he was surfing in Mexico. Three of us went to the movies, A friend of mine and a mutual friend of me and my boyfriend, During the movie his friend grabbed my hand it was felt like an attempt to hold it. Of course i didn’t let this go through, but I left my boyfriend a voicemail telling him about it seeing as i couldn’t get ahold of him down in Mexico. This was only a couple days ago but he hasn’t talked to me since, i still regularly try to call him once a day and i text him in the morning like always. But I’ve noticed he doesnt say “I love you” anymore when he talks to me and he just seems to be ignoring me. Did i do the wrong thing by not wanting to keep things from him? I feel like he is blaming me for the two things that happened, he says he feels like the past is repeating its self. And I just feel like he doesn’t want or love me as much as he used to, he gives off the vibe that he’s mad at me, but i dont think that I did anything for him to be mad at. I thought I was doing all the right things, how do I fix this?

Answer #1

Some thing all girls have to learn is not to tell your boyfriend everysingledetail about everysinglething that happens everysingleday. If your friend in the parking lot kissed you goodbye and you were suprised–best kept to yourself. If someone tried to hold your hands in a theater, best kept to yourself.

I think a lot of guys resent being with a girl who is constantly being hit on and if you go telling him every thing that happens whenever a guy looks at you, then ya–it can get pretty frustrating. Sounds like your man is a bit sick of it and you sound a bit high maintenance. Maybe as you said, you just see it as being honest but maybe your boyfriend sees it as you trying to get a rise out of him or make him jealous and he doesn’t want to play that game.

So tell your boyfriend “you know what, the things that happened were no big deal and I apologize for mentioning them if it made you feel bad or angry.” Then promise not to do it again. But at this point, you may need to have a talk about whether or not you are even staying together if he’s pulling away.

Answer #2

It almost seems like your boyfreind is pulling away. If he isnt even telling you that he loves you anymore then maybe he has seen that the space apart was better. Growing apart can be easy to do. If you think you can savage your realtionship you need to write a letter telling him everything you feel and the next time tell him since he didnt want to talk to you the letter is the only way you can communicate with him.

You didnt do the wrong thing by telling him what happend but he should be able to let go of the fact someone else kissed you cause you took a break. Someone holding your hand now that might have been something you shouldnt have told him. Holding someones hand is nothing.

I hope things work out for the best!

Answer #3

Regardless of how much you love him I have been here before. tf u feel it wasnt provoked it probably wasnt. You cannot have a relationship without trust. Guys hate talking but it sounds like you really need to talk, sit down briefly discuss ti and get over it. he may have these feeling because of your guilt. Stop being guilty you have nothing to be guilty for and by you being guilty makes him wonder if maybe you do. If this doesnt help maybe you need to get out of the relationship. It sounds like all he is doing now is bringing your self esteem down. I just came out of a relationship similiar to this about a year ago with my kids father. Its hard and it hurts to let go, but give it time you will be so glad you did

More Like This
Advisor

Love & Relationships

Dating, Marriage, Breakups

Ask an advisor one-on-one!
Advisor

Imago UK Relationship Therapy

Therapy Services, Counseling Services, Relationship Therapy

Advisor

Principle Skills Relationship...

Counseling Services, Therapy Services, Relationship Workshops

Advisor

Miss Date Doctor® - Relations...

Mental Health Services, Relationship Coaching, Couples Therapy

Advisor

Miss Date Doctor®

Relationship Coaching, Couples Therapy, Dating Coach