How do I stop hurting after a break up?

My boyfriend and I were together for 2 years and 4 months. All the sudden out of no where he told me he wants a break. That we spend too much time together and he wants to experience life. Never in my life have I begged a man to try and stay with me but I did this time. I told him I could change and I would make things better. I have no clue what to do from here. He said he has to think about it and he will let me know soon.

Now, I am not waiting around like some sick puppy for him. I am going out trying to move on but its so hard. I want to be with him. My heart hurts so much. Now I know there are going to be a lot of oh there are other fish in the sea. I don’t want anyone else is the problem. I want him :(

Help on getting over it or getting him back! Thanks!

Answer #1

Whenever a guy says he “wants a break”, technically it means he doesnt want to be with you anymore. More times than any, they dont ever have any intentions of getting back with you. Your just backup in case he doesnt find anyone else. If you want to keep your dignity, move on. Its going to take time, but trust me, you will heal from this. God just has someone else in mind for you.

Answer #2

hey well im sorry to hear this a similar thing happend to me and I also really begged for another chance but he just wasnt having any of it

the thing I learnt is you have to let them do what they want to do you cant force it upon anyone to stay in the relationship and I did beg him before too and he said yes to giving me another chance but it wasnt what he really wanted. he ended up cheating on me..so I shouldnt have begged because I just ended up gettin hurt even more

anyways not sayin your situation is exactly the same but you have to concentrate on your life and doing the things you love and enjoy this will take your mind off him and slowly everything will get better

it probably sounds hard at the moment but keeping occupied really helps.

good luck! =]

Answer #3

congrats on you and your man. having a baby is a big thing! I hope you have an awesome life!

Answer #4

why cant I find a decent lady to be with, I have been in relationships, and love being with someone, the whole doing stuff together, looking after my partner, women just break my heart,I admit I do fall in love way to easy sometimes and grow attached really quick,I had a 4 and a half year relationship with a girl I really loved, and ok I blame myself for that one falling apart as I was always working,and so we grew apart,but my thinking was working hard to make more money to provide us with a better life, but dont think she could see that, it took me a long while to get over that girl, now more recently, I started to get talking to a girl on the internet who lives about 40mins from where I live, we get on real well, feel like I could talk to her about anything, met up, had a fantastic time, talked on the phone loads, texted loads, and really fell for her, she also admitted she had fallen for me, then all of a sudden valentines day she, ended it, because we hadnt spent a lot of time together, even when she was telling me to keep clear for a little bit because she was ill.

now I am absolutly gutted again now, I fell for her, and me being the soft sod I am let her into my world, she said she would never hurt me because she had been through her fare share of bad relationships and bad boys, then she did exactly the opposite of what she said she wouldnt do, I wish I knew the real reason why she ended it, she wont talk to me about it, she just said, it cant work because we are to far apart and shes really busy, and I know she is, but she didnt seem to explain herself, really felt right with this girl, really thought she was the one, and now I dont know what to do,I really want to speak to her, but am finding it so hard trying to not text her or anything to give her a little space, in hope that maybe she would change her mind,

if anyone has any advice to give me I would really appreciate it, why is it girls always go on about needing a nice guy, then the nice guys like me get shit on? somebody please help, I got a healthy heart when it comes to execise, but dont think its built to take heart brake… :-(

Answer #5

This happened to me not long ago as well. It’s been probably about a month. I made the mistake of begging him the first time he said it. I guess he felt bad, and “took back” What he said about wanting a break. But things just got worse. I realize now that I shouldn’t have begged him, and let him have the space that he needed. I admit that I have abandonment issues, and I was with him for over two years. I felt sick whenever he left, and always felt like I needed him there. It came to the point that I couldn’t sleep if he wasn’t there.. It’s sad. It’s horrible, and I feel bad about it. But he told me a month ago that he needed a break–again. And instead of begging him this time, I just let him. It was hard, and it really did feel like I couldn’t breathe. Like I was missing my lungs. I was so upset, and didn’t know what to do. Right after it happened, I swear I thought I was going to die! I too, was waiting around like a sick puppy..jumping every time the phone rang to see if it was him. I was going insane–everything going through my head then.

I’m better now, I took time, and realized that it’s what I needed as well. I realized the bad habits I had, and my own personal problems that no one could deal with but me. I had to help myself, and I respect the fact, now that he needs time. I love him, I do. More than anything in this world. I gave him the time he needed, until he decided to call. I know he cares for me, and no we’re taking it slow. Kind of getting to know each other.

But before I could move on, and heal myself. I had to ask him why..What the problem was. Make sure you’re clear on why he wants to take a break from you. You deserve that much..In a way its closer. It might be most of the time when guys say they want a break that they aren’t coming back. But not always. I don’t want to give you false hope, but I am saying that the sick feeling that you have will go away. It might take time, but sit back and think about things that make you feel good. Memories without him in it, realize the person that you are. Boost up your confidence, and learn to love yourself. It helps. I’m dealing with my issues now..and it hurts less. You just need time… It’s hard to hear that. But it’s true. Take time for yourself to do something you’ve always wanted to do. You need to experience life as well.

Answer #6

I’ve been through the same thing. My ex told me that he “wanted a break.” I begged and pleaded with him to stay together, which he did. And then he cheated on me. Listen to angelfire2708, she basically summed it all up. Wanting a break is a nice way to say I want to break up with you, without hurting your feelings, resulting in stringing you along, giving you false hope of getting back together. The sooner you move on, the better. You shouldn’t have to beg someone to be with you anyway. What you can do to stop hurting? You can start by getting rid of any contact with him. He wants his space? So give it to him. He’ll most likely come back with, “what, we can’t even be friends?” Tell him you have enough friends. There’s no way the two of you can have a friendship without your feelings getting in the way. And lets be honest, listening to your “friend” talk to you about the current girls he’s dating is nothing but heart wrenching and not much of an ego boost. It hurts, I know this. But you will get through it, I promise you. I thought that I would never love anyone else but my ex, until I met my current boyfriend. He showed me how a woman should really be treated. You’re young, and it’s sooo cliche, but there really are so many guys out there. And nice guys too. Nows the time to enjoy life. Hang out with friends, go to parties, focus on school or work, or any hobbies.

Just keep your chin up and don’t give in to your boys bullsht. Because really? Thats all it is, bullsht.

Answer #7

Thanks to all that have helped! My ex and I are currently back together and we are having a baby!

I am happier than ever! turns out I left him alone and let him do what he wanted. I ignored him a little and he came back to me! telling me he missed me and there was no one else like me.

:)

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