How can one confess infedelity knowing the pain it causes?

In The Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous it is suggested as a means to recovery that you practice a program of rigorous honesty,except when to do so , it would harm yourself or others. So, it would seem to me that a situation such as infidelity when you were a practicing addict/ alcoholic would mean first sober up,goto tons of meetings , a lots to do working those 12 steps, (admitting you were powerless,making amends where ever possible , and of course,staying sober). Sometimes you can show the world by setting a good example for others.The changes you have made do not go un-noticed. And when you are able to incorporate the program into your daily life for a long enough period of time, others will come flocking to you because you have something they want. That is serenity. Then you can run for president of A.A. (just kidding about the president thing)! So, YES! I agree with the comment above.And thanks.