Is brown curly, long hair pretty?

Fairest Bellaaa,

It is with much regret that I have to answer your question in a negative fashion (pun obviously intended). For whilst I enjoy brown hair, curly hair and long hair on their own, I cannot honestly tell you that the union of these elements makes for a pretty combination. It doesn’t. Trust me.

Now, I know what you’re saying Bellaaa. “Oh, what does old Nathaniel know about finely coiffed hair? He’s probably some crazy loon from the wrong side of the tracks that wouldn’t know beautiful hair if it smacked him in the face and called him Nancy.” I assure you. Nothing could be further from the truth.

‘Cause here’s the thing, holmes. I’ve watched Cher’s video for If I Could Turn Back Time something like, I don’t know, 150 times. Maybe 200 times. Heck, I went through a phase in my late teens when I used to try to dress just like her in that video and sing the lyrics into my hairbrush. So don’t tell me about long, curly, sassy hair styles. I KNOW all about it. Oh, I know.

In any event, there’s always a chance (however remote) that I’m totally in the wrong. In fact, reading the reply of “sidnn3y123” already has me questioning everything I’ve ever thought about brown, curly long hair. She’s kinda right now that I really, critically think about it. Brown, curly long hair below the b00bs tops makes me want to hurl into a garbage can. Cutting it, like, up to your b00bs tops though? Hmmm. That actually seems rather pleasant to me. You know what? Disregard this whole post. I’m going to go eat a grilled cheese and think about this in more detail.

Sorry so wishy-washy,

Your bff Nathaniel