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How can I accept my boyfriends daughter

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Hi hope you can help with my crises well I have currently been with my boyfriend about a year he has a 3 year old daughter we recently got into this huge fight because I always tend to leave when I know his daughter is coming around. I just dont want to be around for it I feel they can spend THEIR Time together I have gotten attached to her but there has always been something that I can not accept I dont know why I. Maybe because she is not mine. And I am only 20 and I do not want a kid if I did I would of had my own. and me and her mom do not get along she complains about something everytime we take her back clothes, shoes, money anything . yes I knew she was apart of his life since I met him but everything happen so fast and at the beggiining I did not take out relationship serious. so here we are down the line she comes over on the weekends but I dont want to be around Y??? I am fine with them spending time together but not us 3 as a family it not for me and im not ready for it. now he says he is not going ot see her any more and its because of me I did not tell me to pick between us I want him to be apart of her life but im not ready for it and I dont know if I will be later on... will I? he can spend as much time as he wants with her. but he is choosing me I grew up with out a dad and dont want to be the reason for a little girl not having on either

whats there to do?