I have been with my husband for 9 years, we just got married in November of 2012. Throughout our relationship he has cheated on me and I never left him. In fact, he left me once. I just found an email to someone and it was sexually explicit. I want to know if you think someone who has cheated before will ever stop?? Please help. I'm only 24 and I want something better for my life.
There are two types of cheating and it is up to the individual to forgive or not forgive. 1. the type that slips up once and is extremely sorry and might not even remember the other person's name 2. or the person who cheats more than once, and even leaves his significant other.
You should move on. He doesn't respect or care about you and in cases like this, the wife is a safety net. He will ALWAYS have people on the side. That way he can get his kicks and come home to you. You deserve better. It is time to leave him before he leaves you again. The phrase "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me" means something! If he has cheated MORE THAN ONCE then don't even hesitate. In my opinion, I couldn't personally forgive cheating once. Some people can. But I believe that when it doesn't stop, it is time to call it quits! You are 24, you could find someone who actually loves and respects you!
Confront him about how you feel. he could either be able to change or be the type of person who will just keep cheating. It might be a good idea if you really want the relationship to work to both see a marriage counsellor were you can both openly talk about why he cheats and wether or not he thinks he can change it. If he has cheated numerous times on you already though i would personally say that he's probably not going to stop cheating and you should find someone who loves and respects you more.
To add to Gaia, there are the sort of cheaters who just cannot commit to one person. It's not that that sort of person can never change, it's that they have to truly want to change their ways and lifestyle. Your husband, has been cheating throughout, it doesn't seem like he wants to change it doesn't sound like he's even slightly inclined to change. You can try marriage counseling but you are young and I do think you are worth much more than this.
Thanks to everyone who took the time to reply. I have weighed out a lot of things and am trying to decide what I should ultimately do. (even though I know what I should do) It isnt always easy. -- lostinspace
He's using you. Stop going back to this a-hole, you're too young to have to deal with this BS! Go out there and find a man who will treat you like a queen!
Thank you for y our reply, it has been very beneficial in helping me decide what I should be doing with myself and my life.
Glad I could help -- Andrew