Me and my ex are really close, he's pretty much my best friend.. but, sometimes he'll think something is wrong with me, like I'm mad or something.. So he'll ask 'what's wrong?' and If I say nothing, he thinks I'm lying..
Yesterday I went out for my birthday and played football all day with my dad and brothers so I was a little tired, and he again asked me what's wrong, and that I seemed mad or depressed.. I said ''No, I think I'm just tired or something''. . .
And he said, ''You think I'm stupid or something, I know you're lying'' and I said ''Seriously, I'm not, because I never run around and I did all day today so I'm sore and tired''. . . and he just got up and left and hasn't talked to me (we always hang out, so I can tell he's mad at me).. I asked him what's the matter and he said 'nothing' and walked away..
He knows I hate when he gets like that but he won't talk to me until I go up to him and get him to talk... but I'm sick of doing that! I didn't do anything wrong, but he always turns it around to make me think it's my fault.
Anyway, sorry it's long, but I need advice.:)
I've been in relationships that are similar, the bottom line is that that's his way of controlling you. Its so subtle its hard to see it, but when he demands you tell him whats wrong and you don't, then to control you or make you feel like you "should have listened" he punishes you. He's playing games with you. And the purpose of the whole game is to keep you guessing and trying to keep him happy because that puts him in control. He calls the shots, he says what ok and not okay. Guys who are really good guys do this too... its a way of feeling in control when your afraid, it doesn't mean hes a bad guy, it just means that hes got behavioral issues like we all do, only these behavioral issues can be damaging to you. Which is why you can't play his game and figure out what he wants, because he doesn't know, all he wants is to be in control which isn't fair to you, so you need to decide what you want regardless of what he's doing and stick to it. For your sake. because guys like this don't change... and no matter how much you change, if its his problem and he won't change it, it will never get better. Good luck!
Im a guy who recently went through a breakup with a friend and we are still pretty close but I find sometimes she is similar to your problems. I found that in the relationship I had to do a lot of things, like make the plans for the date... etc, and sometimes I just wanted her to participate more. Occasionally I would ask "whats the matter" or something and think she was lying when "nothing" was the awnser, so I felt like something was wrong on my part and she wouldent talk about it, so yea maybe you just gotta have an uninterrupted conversation with him and speak your mind, let it all go.
He prob stills cares for you, at least you know he wonders if your ok, which is a good sign, but he may be overreacting just a tad bit. Your right about one thing, guys always want girls to come to them, because guys are the dominant ones. Its time that you show him, that you aren't always gonna chase after him because he's mad. If he is your friend, he will relize he is doing something wrong, and try to change it. If he don't, well, he's a jerk like a lot of other guys. (no offense :]) Hopefully this helps.
- Advice girl. :]
Yeah, if he's going to be that way, try to talk it out. If he doesn't want to fx anything or he just keeps getting mad at you for no reason, then the relationship isn't really worth it. He probably just wants attention and for you to come running after him every time he gets upset. Don't let him step all over you like that!
don't worry yourself ova someone who dats not appreciate u.