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What should I do if the guy I like is leaving?

So. I like him. He likes me. Romantically. We’re not dating however.

Twist is, he’s in the Philippines for a year or possibly more, to take care of his family. The catch of the twist is.. we won’t have contact. None at all. The reason why has nothing to do with our relationship, so I’d prefer to leave that out.

He left on the 31st, and 2o1o would have been our third year knowing each other, and as very, very close friends. And, after three years of talking to him almost everyday, my life feels so empty without him. He’s one of my closest friends, and undoubtedly, if he wasn’t leaving, 2010 would be the year we get together as a couple, finally.

I’m SCARED to face this whole year ahead without him. and I’m scared not knowing what’s happening with his life. I know he wont forget me. I know I wont forget him. That’s not the problem.

The issue is, I MISS HIM. It aches. What should I do about it? Please don’t tell me to move on, I fully intend on waiting for him. :|

I’ve tried telling myself “Use this year to make yourself a better person! Even more likable than before!” but.. it’s not working. I just miss him so much. How should I deal with it? :|

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Answer #1

It will take some time to get used to him not being around, if you are as dependent on him as you say then this time apart without contact is actually beneficial for you, you totally need to focus on yourself and to be independent and self assured, self reliant, we all need someone in out lives, but we should not need someone to the point that we have no life of our own or no sense of self without them. The process you are going through is not that different from someone who has died. Now it is only the 4th of January for crying out loud give yourself some time don’t give up so easily. Now the harsh reality, I am very suspicious of the fact that there is no way to contact him, I will grant that they may not have a phone, or the internet, but I am pretty sure that good old fashioned letter writing posted through good old fashioned mail should be an option.

Good luck to you and I wish you all the best,

Answer #2

You guys really did help xD Thank you very much~ Especially the letter suggestions from you both. (: Thank you again.

Answer #3

I’ve had this before. Its not going to be easy. Sorry, but that’s the bottom line. Distract yourself. Find a hobby. Take up knitting! Do something to take your mind off things. Maybe keep a diary of what goes on in your head, to vent it and stop yourself from doing things you’ll regret later (in otherwords, self-harming). I know its easy to tell yourself you’ll never get into those sorts of things but believe me, its very easy to do so when you’re missing someone who makes living worthwhile. Write letters to him to vent it, even if you can’t send it. Then when he returns, you could say ‘hey look what I got up to while you were gone.’ Hope I helped, -D. xoxo

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