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I wrote this poem and I need you to tell me if its good.need all the criticism I can get -would it matter- People say they love But not to me My walls are black My soul is to My heart is crumbling As my mind is melting The night creeps in The blood bleeds throw If I die tomorrow would it matter to you.
It needs some fixing, I don't know how you'd go about it, though.
-Would It Matter?-
People speak of love, But to me-It's never expressed Anger built up, Solely out of detest
Blackened-Are the walls that surround My soul is lost-Never to be found My heart is crumbling, As my mind begins to melt
The night creeps in,
The blood soaks through
If I died tomorrow,
Would it matter to you?
I'm told I have a strange style, but that's what I'd do. Fix it up a bit. :]
I love that sooo much, especially the ending. that is really sad, but its in like a happy way, if you et what im saying... but I love it. ah~mazin jobb
OMG!that is soo depressing!! (but thats good) good job! thumbs up from me
I lkii it :] But its s0 sh0rt