What do you do when you are married but someone else wants you?

Well, a classic maneuver for men to pull on unsuspecting women is the GUILT TRIP! Women are more sensitive and emotional than men, by this man planting these feelings in you, he is making sure you’re not just going to tell him to take a hike. Because of guilt, etc.

You already have these thoughts from your question! You want a good way to tell him to get lost, however, you have to be aware that other people’s actions have no bearing on you! If you told him strongly, ‘ no I don’t want you, I want my husband’ and he said something like ‘I have no reason to live’ you would take it back, right? Just to placate him and keep him from doing something stupid. You have to remain strong and not let him manipulate you like that!! How would you feel if you were in your husbands shoes? You would just want him to tell this woman to get lost and never speak to her again. Which is what you have to do for your husband, the man you spent paragraphs praising. Keep reminding yourself how much he has done for you and the children he gave you. You will find the strength to do the right thing, I’m sure.

You haven’t known this guy for over a decade, that’s a LONG time. You don’t know what he’s been doing with his life. He might not even be suicidal, you haven’t been his shadow. He could be saying anything and everything to keep you in his life. He sounds manipulative and sneaky, IF he is trying to pull this over you. I don’t know if he is or not, I don’t know him. I’m telling you what it sounds like.

You have to be honest with him, you’re grown up now, not a teenager and you have responsibilities to your husband AND to your children. Make him understand how much they mean to you and you don’t want to hurt THEM because they are your FAMILY. Not some guy from high school that you liked years and years ago.

Be firm, don’t let him guilt you into remaining friends with him. Did you add him or did he add you on this site? In my opinion, relationships between spouses get complicated when one or both of the spouses have friends of the opposite sex. Or one or both talk to people online, things can get tricky! So just be aware of that for next time.

At the end of the day, you took VOWS to your husband and promised to love him, cherish him, care for him! Not this guy from school, remind this other guy that. He wasn’t there when you went through these horrible things in your past. He hasn’t helped you through them and helped you become a happy person, a MOTHER. If this guy is decent he will respect you for doing the right thing. Not ruining your childrens lives for a guy you ‘sort of have feelings for’.

I hope this helps,

Good luck!