How can I stop seeing myself as looking so terrible?

Well back in like middle school i use to get made fun of alot beause my family is wiccan. I use to get called ugly and a freak and alot of other nasty things even though i wasnt any of them. After a while i actully started to belive it but was kicked out of school and sent to a “bad kid” school basically. They didnt know about and the onces that did didnt really care. Well i’ve had alot of boyfriend and all my bestfriend gush at how pretty i look somtimes but no matter what i cant belive it. They tell me how skinny i am but i feel like i look over weight, they tell me im gorguse without makeup and all i see is blotchy skin and scars. It upsets my boyfriend that I can’t see myself the way he does, is there anyway i ever can?

Answer #1

Firstly, my opinion, you’re really pretty. Being Wiccan does not make a person ugly. I love Wicca, it actually makes people endearing- to those of us who understand Wiccans do not ride brooms and cackle. Most girls see more flaws than perfections. There’s no way around it. They say curvy, we say fat. They say cute, we say childish. They say tall, we say beanpole. This is gonna sound crazy, but I want you to try it. Write a love letter to yourself. Talk about what you like, your ‘flaws’ that other people like, what you think is beautiful about yourself. Remember flaws to one person could be perfection to another. Some guys like slim girls because they seem fragile. Some guys like chunky girls because they’re soft to cuddle with. You should believe your friends. The real ones tell you straight, and if they say you’re gorgeous, then you’re gorgeous.

Answer #2

Girl, i was the exact same way my entire life almost..but mine is different..everyone told me how pretty i was and all that..and i would see myself as ugly and fat..i had alot of self image problems..its crazy…then i got pregnant..and in the middle of my pregnancy i had looked at my pre-pregnancy pictures and i thought to myself..what the heck was i thinking..i went through a stage of starving myself because i thought i was fat (and other issues) ..and i seen those pictures and wanted to slap myself lol..because my arms were so little..i was like..wow..now im wishing i had my tummy back! lol..but now i have more self image issues now that i’ve had a baby..but im not sure how to help you..but if you just look in the mirror and find the pretty things you like about yourself..dont worry about the flaws..but dont take so much time on hating on yourself..you might later regret it..just enjoy life and try to be happy..and btw i think you are pretty! so take it from someone who knows..i wish i would have never been sooo hard on myself..maybe i could have enjoyed life better if it wasn’t for my image issues..i hope i somewhat helped =]

Answer #3

Do something to make you beautiful and to get confident to face people Learn beauty tips on how to look fresh and pretty as well…

Answer #4

When you look at yourself, you are sort of in two roles at once: You are both the subject who looks, and the object you are looking at. Instead of focusing on you as the object of your own gaze, try paying attention to the act of looking.

Sit in front of a single flower and spend some time looking at it. Do you have an image of an “ideal” flower in your head that the real flower fails to live up to, or do you just admire the flower as it is? Whichever you answer, try to deliberately switch to the other way of looking, to explore how the two ways feel different to do. Starting with the flower and then moving to trees and all kinds of other things, practice looking at them just to see and appreciate them as they are (both at their surface and in their essential being), without positive or negative judgment. Then try doing the same with people. Can you look at “beautiful” people just to really see them, without positive judgment of their appearance? Can you look at “homely” people the same way? At disfigured people?

The point is, Jade Aryanna, you don’t need to look different. But you can learn to see yourself and others differently.

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