how do i get more privacy from my mom?

she keeps reading through all my messages on aim and cell phone

I do not know, we did not have this when I was a kid, and the reason that she does this is probably to protect you. If you have nothing to hide then after a while she will get bored with checking up on you.

Well i assume she pays for the cell phone. And the internet. So you’re kinda out of luck as to stopping her. Here’s two ways to go about this. You can either start deleting all your messages on your cell and aim (you know, you can set it so your conversations dont save). That will make her more suspicious, and she will be even more intrusive. Or you can start thinking about why she’s doing what she is doing. We’re going to pretend that she does not have some sort of mental disorder, she is not trying to make your life miserable, and she is not out to be all powerful and controlling (you can do it…). So, now, why else would a mother waste her time on teen chit chat (which quite frankly, she probably doesnt even understand most of what is being said with all that slang). Why is she so bothered that she’s going to take time to do that? Perhaps because she has no idea what is going on in your life. I’d suggest you start talking to her more. You guys are in a cycle, and someone needs to break the cycle. If you start talking to her about your life, she wont have to snoop. You can explain that when she snoops, you feel xyz, and that you would prefer that she comes to you and asks you directly, and you will try to be honest (you need to mean this).

Well, one thing to remember is that your mom will do anything for you as long as you keep the grades up and respect her. I know that from years of experience! Now I’m not going to be a straight forward unhelpful person and tell you to: Talk to her, and she will understand! Because she probably won’t, because you’re her kid. So just pretend to ignore her, that’s all you can do now, and just act sincere whenever she asks something. If she says: Can I volunteer at the school’s _, then say: No thanks, mom. They’ve got enough. But note: Don’t make it seem like you would’ve liked it if she did. I know that’s probaby not what she’s asking about, it’s probably about a boy or something, right? But with my example, don’t say: No thanks, mom. It’s okay, maybe next time. Because the last part of that sentence says, yes, mom, that was a disappointment! And that is not what you want. Hope that helps!

You have to earn that trust from her, you can’t expect privacy if your the kinda girl that does so many things behind her back. If you expect her to let you have your own life on the internet, or to let you go out when she does not even know where your going, then it wont happen because she is traying to protect you and to make sure you are safe, believe me things happen outhere that are just horrable. But if you want things like her not reading your textmassages, or like letting her lock your room, then make sure you are showing it to her that you deserve that trust, meaby try talking to her so you guys can talk about what lines can be crossed and what lines can’t.

If your mother is snooping, it is likely out of fear. Perhaps she is afraid you’re doing something you’re not supposed to be, but more likely than not she is just afraid that someone else out there might take advantage of you.

The best way to stop this kind of thinking is to help foster an open, honest relationship with her. I know it’s not easy, but if she feels like you are able to talk to her about what’s going on in your life and trusts that you know how to take care of yourself, she’ll be less inclined to go looking behind your back.

If you have your own computer and phone, you can always password protect your things, but this will almost certainly lead to fighting and animosity in the house, which isn’t any fun for anyone….

really depends, for the most part id tell my parents to leave me the hell alone, if ur smart enough n have ur parents support ull be fine, if ur too stupid to be a responsible person, they may have to hover over u forever.