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Even if it will hurt the parents feelings or make the child hate them, do you think they should put the childs best interest at heart before his/her needs?
Depending on the situation. Say , in a airplane when the air masks deploy , you must help yourself first otherwise you may not be able to help your child. Then there are moments you have to assist a child first , like if you were in a car accident and the child is more hurt than you and/or stuck in the wreck. So it does depend on the situation. Plus , they do have needs. Like if you were extremely poor and had not enough money to care for a child , you should give it up , regardless of how the child feels about it. But you could get a family or friend to take care of the child. The most serious things , you must decide. If it does not make that much difference if you let the child choose if it would like to do something else then of course let their wishes come true. It all depends on the situation.
Ironic - I just went through this battle, myself. My daughter, who is 13, has lived with me all her life. Her father was an abusive man and a drunk. Last year at school, she was being bullied. The school tried to get it under control, but nothing worked. Unfortunately, we have only one school here that she could go to, so transferring was not an option. I had to allow my daughter to go live with her father in another town, knowing I would only get to see her a few times a year, just so she didn't have to live with the burden of bullies. I can tell you this - if it weren't for his wife, who is a good woman and I know cares about my daughter like her own - she wouldn't be living with him, but I miss her a great deal. Both my daughters have left home now, and I have only my son here.
The instinct here is to say yes, but there could be a thousand different circumstances.... who decides what the best interests are? If it's a choice between cigarettes and baby formula, of course it's an easy thing to answer. But what if it's a choice between keeping your child and not having much money, or letting it live with a rich relative? Who decides if the child is better off having a bedroom with a TV and every toy imaginable, than it would be living in a small one-bedroom apartment sleeping on a sofa instead of a bed?
How about if the child wanted to move with his/her mother, when she has been living with the father for all her life. When it would be better for the child nutritionally, emotionally, physically and mentally? But what if you know that if you let the child go, you would never forgive them, and it would tear apart your relationship.?
I think that as a parent, you will always have that instinct to take care of your child first. But of course, sometimes there is no way for any person to help another person without first taking care of themselves.
The child needs her mother, and the father needs to forgive, and understand, and refuse to let it destroy the relationship. Easy to say, I suppose? But parents are adults...and children have needs.
thats kind of the point to being a parent. to care for a child who is theirs, with a parent, children are helpless so a parent should put their childs needs before theres,
Only to an extent. Not to the point where it completely ruins their lives and they end up with no hobbies, friends or real interests. There should be balance.
A parent should always put a child first in their life. They chose to bring the child into the world.
Well your a good parent^
^^True
