my brothers living with me, hes a thief

my mum died in march. my brother who has just turned 17 lives with me now. thing is he stole tens of thousands of pounds off my mum when she was dying. this has became an addiction, I know hes already stole a tenner out my purse. I have to hide my purse all the time now and hide anything thats worth anything.

he does bugger all here in my house, he seems quite depressed because he isnt around his mates nomore. I have a 6 months old and my house has never been this messy and I’ve never been so out of pocket with taking him into my care.

what can I do?so tempted to kick him out…

Answer #1

im not his mother, so cant really take over that role. he has never robbed anybody or stolen from a shop, its his FAMILY that he robs off. this started 4 years ago…when he just pinched a fiver for a CD but the last times he stole off my mum its was thousands, she did sue him, he was arrested but let out on bail and had to do community services, which didnt really make him learn.

Answer #2

I’m so so sorry for you loosing your mum :( must be very hard, especially with a new baby…

to be honest, you have a responsibility to your baby now, more so than him. I would say to him either things change, or your gone…

what ever he is doing, he is doing it with no concern or respect for the baby you have to provide for now. stealing is completelty unacceptable. regardless of HIS age, he needs to get in line now. yes your mum has passed away and that must be so hard for both of you, but that is no excuse for not helping out around the house, or contributing…

I would speak to him first, say to him that unless things REALLY change he is going to have to leave. say to him that your unhappy with being put in this position, but you have to ensure the environment tat you and your baby live and is secure and how you want it.

it’s your home, you have the right to demand that it is kept within a certain standard, and with a baby it needs to be tidy…especially since, if baby isn’t already, baby will be crawling very soon..

ask him how he’s feeling, what he is dtealing the money to buy. you need to demonstrate to him you know that money went missing, and he needs to pay you back that money and become more independent..

and I say, I realise he’s only 17 and his mum has passed away, but he can’t push your relationship like this, and he will have to learn that…he is taking advantage of your generosity and you need to point out that you don’t want to be in the position when you feel he has to go, but you don’t feel you have any other choice. hopefully, he will talk to you and work WITH you…fingers crossed… x

Answer #3

Kick him out… tough love let the kid learn the hard way… let him get arrested for robbing someone and let him see exactly how great life is behind bars… after he gets out take him back in and see if it made any difference

Answer #4

may b you should tell someone not to hurt him put to keep him out of troble he going to thank you in the long run

love nieya

Answer #5

Tell him gently that Stealing is not right. He might just be reacting this way from your mom’s death( So sorry about by the way), just tell him that it’s not right. And if he is depressed then try to do something that makes him happy though you might be busy with the baby!!! Just see where he is coming from before you kick him out. For all you know, he could be in danger. Good luck, God Bless!

Answer #6

thanks for that, I’ll try talking to him. I dont really want to kick him out, he’d have nowhere to live since hes come from abroad to live with us. this is also putting a strain on my relationship, the littlest things like him eating my boyfriends crisps or using all the toothpaste. were all going on holiday on tuesday(which I paid for my bro aswell)so hopefully that’ll go smootly. thanks for your advice.

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