Home More advice Love & Relationships
I thought I was a VERY strong person mentally. Now I realize am not. I put things off and pretend like I dont care when inside im dying. Im very dramatic and I wont lie abt it. I have my good moments and bad moments. Im strong yet im extremely weak when it comes to some people. I know stuff is affecting me but I dont want to do anything abt it. I keep everything from everyone. I feel like I cant trust anyone but one person. Im constantly worrying abt everyone and everything but when it comes to something affecting me I wont care. I realize this is a bad way to live. I dont care abt myself I do stuff I KNOW will hurt me. Im constantly breaking down and I cant tell anyone abt it. I cant trust anyone anymore[[except one person]] and that person has her own probs. I dont understand why I get so emotional and cranky outta nowhere. I miss people I let go and I know I cant have them back. I've said things I didnt mean. I've done things I didnt want to do. Im driving myself nuts. I probably sound insane at the moment but I dont care. How can I possibly calm myself at mind? How can I stop stressing abt things I know I cant fix? How can I learn to focus on myself instead of people who dont matter? -_- I sound fkin crazy.
You dont sound crazy at all, thats life honey. It has its ups and downs, and from the looks of it you are experiancing both of them. Its good that you think about others, but please think of yourself once in a while. try to think positive. it is very hard to trust people, and it is even harder when you do trust someone but then they end up forgetting about you, I can say this from experiance. everything you said up there, I went through. I want you to know your not alone, but you have to snap out of it sometime. trust me once you start thinking positive about life and about yourself, it all gets better from there. sure things will be rough at times but its how that saying says: it only makes you stronger. there are a lot of people who probabaly care about you, even if you are unaware of it. like I said try thinking a lot more positive about life, your Life was meant, for you to love it...you control your life. Live it... dont let it pass you by.
You are human sweetheart. But...its not healthy to put others needs above yours. You need to learn how to put yourself first if its needed. Stressing over things constantly can cause a lot of problems: high blood pressure, stomach ulcers, you're too young for all of that. If you, and your parents aren't against it I think you might benefit from some counseling. Seeing a counselor doesn't mean you have a mental disorder, but the benefit of seeing one is they can teach you how to learn to relax and learn how to say,"no, I've had too much and I can't handle any more right now". It doesn't make you a weak person because you do these things you wrote about. It makes you human, and humans (no one at all) aren't perfect. And it doesn't mean your weak if you reach out for help at times! Good luck! (=
The only thing I can tell you is to keep your chin up. I lost both my jobs at the beginning of the year and have been living off unemployment since. things look really bad. But you gotta stay positive. If your feeling down watch a funny movie. Just keep yourself busy. wake up every morning knowing that things are gonna change. And I guarantee you it will change a lot faster than you think