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How should I handle this situation?

My at the time ex boyfriend was hooking up with a girl in another town whom I don’t know. This girl is his bestfriend’s gilfriends bestfriend. I just found out today that he was hooking up with this girl. I saw a texted in his phone from her asking him when he was comming back to visit and that she was horny. This devistated me. I tried to confront him about it but the only thing he told me was they “messed around” when we were broken up. And he turned it around on me saying that it was my fault because I looked through his phone. Even though while we were broken up me and him were still hanging out and hooking up. Now we are back together. And I just don’t think I can do this anymore. This isn’t the first time he has done this type of thing! any advice would be great

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Answer #1

If you were not in a relationship at the time, it is absolutely none of your business what he did with whom. Being in a romantic relationship does not give you the right to every piece of information about their sexual history. If you cannot be happy with what you have of him right now, then no, you are not ready to be in a relationship, with him or anyone else.

He is absolutely in the right. It was a heinous breach of his privacy to go through his phone without his permission, and the golden rule of being a nosy, untrustworthy snoop is that you might just find something you wish you hadn’t. I desperately hope you have learned your lesson in that regard, or else you are going to make a string of boyfriends very miserable, and it’s not going to do a lot for your self-esteem either.

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