How can I trust him after he cheated on me with a guy?

I’ve been going out with my boyfriend for 3 months now. I’m 14 and he’s 18 so there is a bit of an age difference. The thing is he knows we can’t have sex without him getting in trouble if people find out, we do other stuff like head and fingering but he wants more. I said no and he understood but his best friend offered to have sex with him who’s a guy. They done it and he says it was the biggest mistake of his life and really regrets it as he says it’s the first time he’s even tried anything with a guy and the same for his best friend. I forgave him because he was really sorry and promised not to do it again but now I don’t know if I can trust him or should I just have sex with him so he doesn’t do anything like that again?

Answer #1

Do not think that you have to have sex with him just because he got it somewhere else. If anything that should make you not want to have sex with him even more. Who’s to say that he told the truth and that was really the first time? In my personal experience guys don’t just decide they are going to have sex with each other, I mean serisouly, one of them or both of them are bisexual/bicurious and have probably experimented, but I honestly don’t feel like guys experiementing is as accepted as girls. Do what you think is right, but my honest opinion is to move on and find someone who is willing to wait as long as you want. I definatley would make him earn his trust back before you even consider having sex with him and I mean he is in the dog house big time so really make him work at it. I think you should take a break as well don’t just forgive someone for cheating like that because then they will assume they can get you back no matter what they do, he’s immature. Hope this helped!

Answer #2

Well I am sure he is sorry and it can be hard to trust him again and you will always worry btu DO NOT have sex just because of this. Its not worth it until youre completely ready or until you are 16 and if you did have sex will it make a difference? If you did and he cheated again. It would be worse than not doing it. You have to trust him and if it happens again then you have to think if its worth it. Doing somethng you are not comfortable with isnt going to get you anywhere, and it could knock your confidence and ruin the relationship. Try to trust him as much as possible and you will always worry even if he doesnt ever do anything again, you will have times when you competely trust him but do not do anything if its not right :) x

Answer #3

First off sweetheart, you are too young to be even thinking bout sex and second…He’s a homo and I’m sure thats not his first time doing something like that. So be a child and let him go and go be free be happy, be your age cause he’s really a pedophile to even want to be with someone your age and then he had sex with a guy..Honey you do not need him cause having sex with someone like him you gone end up catching aids…Please consider what I have told you

Answer #4

jszyt2011,

You do know that HIV/AIDS is most predominant among female African-Americans than any other demographic? It’s not a “gay disease*. Just because her boyfriend slept with a man, does not mean she’s going to catch the virus.

Secondly, it depends on state law whether he’s considered a “pedophile” for dating her at the age of 14.

You may be true he’s a “homo”, but that word is extremely derogatory. ‘Gay” is the right way of putting it. He may be gay and confused. She should sit down with him and talk, not write him off as a homo with AIDS immediately.

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