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How can I help her?
Ok so my girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year and counting she’s 14 I’m 16 we’re in a long distance relationship and and we’ve been keeping it a secret from her parents and well her parents treat her like crap seriously one of the harshest things you can think of she’s most likely been through it,her parents seem to want to kill her at times her mom almost actually did it one time by choking her and like I really want to go to Texas to pick her up and bring her with me back to Cali but she doesn’t want to leave her parents because she doesn’t want them to have a bad reputation and have people talking about them like “oh her daughter left with some guy because they are horrible parents” I mean can you beleive that my girlfriend is a sweet heart,the sweetest girls you’ve ever met she doesn’t even give her parents a reason to get mad with her and out of nowhere they always end up giving her crap like everyday and she cries herself to sleep sometimes and I try to help her through it like I try to be her emotional support and to show her that someone does love her and even though her parents don’t I do and well I feel so useless it’s like I want to go to texas tell her parents off and make them suffer for what they’re doing to her,she goes through the cruelest things and I wish I could do more to help her there are so many things stopping me from going to texas like school,summer school,and I have no money to travel except $100 that I’ve saved up and I don’t know what to do is there anything I can do to make her feel safer and better and so I won’t feel so totally useless?Please help I really need some advice on this.
I know exactly what you mean. You would benefit in talking to my boyfriend. He lives far away as well and he’s always with me for moral support, but he thinks that that isn’t enough. My dad beats on me all the time and my worries are the same as what your girlfriend thinks. He wants to come and get me also but I won’t let him. What you need to do is ALWAYS make sure that you are there for her no matter what. Answer every phone call, every E-mail, every IM whatever. She needs to know that you will always be there for her no matter what the circumstances. She will need a backup lifeline when things get tough. Also, do the police know how her parents treat her? If her parents go so far that they try to kill her, go down and get her, or tell the police. You can go during the summer (its coming up soon) and you could be there and back in less than a few days. If that is not possible, see if there are any relatives that she can stay with. My boyfriend couldn’t take it anymore and he said that if I didn’t tell someone about the abuse at home, he would. I didn’t want to because it would tear my family apart, but I knew he would, and this was my battle, not his. I told eventually and my dad is now getting some help, but I never would be able to if my boyfriend didn’t motivate me to. That is what you need to do. YOU need to take action if she won’t. If you care this much, your actions need to be in the best interest for her, not everyone else. Please keep me updated. This so closely relates to my life that I need to see what happens. Stay strong, love much, and good luck.
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