How can I get my girlfriend to listen to me?

Im 16 and so is my girlfriend we’ve been going out for over a year now but she’s beginning to behave differently she’s changing but not in a good way. Recently at parties her and her friend think they’re being cool or whatever by smoking. This really annoys me and she knows this but she wont listen to me when I asked her to stop it. I get the feeling she’s just doing it to annoy me. The parties weren’t so bad but yesterday and today her friends started smoking at lunchtime and the other day she said she didnt think that that was cool which I was glad of. However today she said to one of her friends she doesn’t mind as long as she takes her with them next time. Everytime I try and consult her about it she just gets annoyed and says ill do what I want im my own person and that I should stop trying to control her. Does anyone have any advice on what I should do?

Answer #1

You can only do so much, you tell her one time how you feel about something and that should be it, you don’t want to keep pushing the subject or pressuring her to quit something she doesn’t want to because it is controlling and it will cause her to not want to be with you. It’s really respect if you say you don’t agree with something and she continues to do it right in front of you then she doesn’t respect what you have to say…maybe it’s time to start thinking if she is indeed the right person for you…I have said this many times it’s not about love, you may love someone sooo much, but that does not make them the right person for you! It’s obvious that regardless of what you say she is going to do whatever she decides…I don’t know she sounds a little rebellious and I can totally see how it’s annoying because they think it’s cool when really it smells, it’s unattractive, and it’s very harmful to the environment and not to mention her body/health. Good luck, but I think you should give her an ultimatum and that will show you just how much she cares about you..like a test.

Answer #2

People change and not always for the good. You have to decide if you can accept her this way without judging her. Keep in mind that this is the path she has chosen and she most likely will keep going farther down that path. There is nothing you can do about it if she won’t listen to you. If you don’t want to live this way then you need to move on. As hard as that may seem it may be the right thing to do.

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