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Doesn't your school have Peer Editing office? Our school has a class where students (most Seniors who have been recommended by their English Teachers) peer edit papers for others and give them back. I submitted a paper into them once and got it back the same day with professional reviews. Try asking a friend who's in an advanced English class to help you out as well.
I really understand you. I also always had different problems with writing an essay. After all, I am used to doing everything perfectly or never. Therefore, I very often used services to write or correct a personal essay. I really liked one and I can recommend it. With this service, I had the highest marks for the essay. For me, this is a pointer.
I am suggesting a site for you. Read it. Then you can select an editing service easily. It is very difficult to find a genuine editing service.
i think most of them you have to pay money... why don't you just get a parent, friend, or likeeee an older sibling to edit it for you?
I guess this website is pretty good for this aim