Funadvice Logo
Explore Join
More Parents & Family Questions

Going deeper into my problem

My parents have done a lot for me and im supposed to b like a miracle for them.a lot of people in my family are looking forward to my marriage.I’ve told my mom that I dont want to get married;I’ve also asked her to wait till im 26.she says at 24 or 26 I’ll b to old for marriage and people will think something is wrong wid me.another problem is she’ll try to find me a guy who is a little traditional and im not traditional.I dont even want to be in india.my parents dont believe in love.im not even allowed to talk much wid guys.my parents have a fixed image of who I am in their mind and that’s definitely not me.if I say anything they either think I dont mean it or that they’ll be able to change my mind.and as for getting to know the guy -I may b allowed to talk with him for maybe 30 minutes and im supposed to say if I like him.and once the marriage is fixed it ‘ll be too many problems if I say no later;once the marriage is over-im stuck 4 life.they are too protective-im not allowed to go out alone.im scared to do anything on my own.I also have an inferiority complex.

Some help

Become an Expert →
Answer #1

Hi !

Your situation is so pathetic, don’t feel or don’t worry about that. Right now you need a support. Do you have any family relative who close to you? if you have tell your problem and ask him/her to talk with your parents. I accept Our parents have done lot to us but we are not slave, we have rights to decide our future so don’t think about your parents set your own (But right way. I hope you are going right way). Don’t think that I am criticizing your parents, I love my parents bcz they won’t decide without my wish. I am lucky one …

Answer #2

You have to stand up to your parents no matter what they think. Its your life and you only get one chance to live it the way you want to. It doesnt matter if they dont believe in love as long as you do. Love is the most powerfull thing in this world and it is not affected by age or race or anything!!! You HAVE to do what you believe is right. I know it sounds difficult but its the only way you will ever be happy. I hope my advice helps you.

Answer #3

I know how hard it is in certain cultures. Will they threaten to dis-own you? I guess in America you have the option to move away. I would say “no” regardless of what they say.

Answer #4

I think you should make up your mind that whether you want to see your parents happy or your happiness is more important to you. To be very frank, since I am also from India I am also in the same situation but I have made up my mind. My parents have also done a lot for me. I have sacrifised my love for my parents since my parents wanted me to marry a girl of my caste. As you are telling that your parents have done a lot for you, than I think their happiness should be more important to you. one thing is sure that you have to get married to a person whome your parents choose, than whats the issue if you marry now or after 2-3 years. If your parents are happy if you marry now. But atleast request them that you want to get married after your studies are finished.

More Like This
Advisor

Parents & Family

Parenting, Marriage, Childcare

Ask an advisor one-on-one!
Advisor

Universal Srushti Fertility

Fertility Center, IVF Centre, Surrogacy Centre

Advisor

Tumblr

Advisor

Nicole Beurkens

Child Psychology, Behavioral Health, Parenting

Advisor

Terre Baby

Baby Products, Parenting, Affiliate Marketing

Advisor

Nature Explorers Inc.

Outdoor Activities, Family Recreation, Health & Fitness