Hey guys, I've been with my boyfriend for about 4 months now and we've been perfect for each other ever since. Now comes the stressful moment for me, which is like I guess you would call an "insecure" moment? because whenever he hangs with others girls of his friends, I feel like worried, that I don't want him to do anything. I tell him everytime I have thoughts torturing me over and over and he always tells me he loves me and says I'm his and always. But I can never skip over the feeling and thoughts that he might do something. Like this weekend my best friend is off from work and he asked her what about hanging out and never approached me first...which gave me a hint that something was up. I don't want to feel this way...I guess having a bf/gf is a lot of responsibilites or something because this is the first I've ever felt this way in my entire life. I never had a bf ever until this yar and it's been crazy that I'm afraid he'll see me as "complicated" :/ Please if anyone ahs any answers, that would be much appreciated! o:
There is nothing in the world that will send a guy running than being insecure and clingy. Try to stop thinking so much about him and start working on yourself looking for happiness within you. Surround yourself with positive people and BE SURE you have a life separate from his. Know your self worth and believe that you are a wonderful person worthy of love. If this is the right person for you, there will be no need to worry. If he is not...learn to love yourself and move on. There are PLENTY of good guys out there!
I know I can't control him, nor do I wish to or change him. But He's always told me that he';ll never leave me but I think I'm going too far with this stress. Besides, I also try hanging out with his friends...not really helpful considering I'm a quiet person, somewhat anti-social at points whenever they talk or whatever. For him to see his friends ofte and I rarel ever see mine, it seems as if he sees them way too much than myself. Well for now at least, another thing that bothers me and triggers my emotions, however.
You really have no control over your BF's actions. What you do have some control over is yourself. Suspicion, distrust, and worry are poison and can drive a wedge between you two. If your BF says that you are his girl than it is in your best interest to believe him. If he breaks your heart than it be on him but it won't be you that is driving him away. I'm not saying that you should turn a blind eye to obvious signs but few things are as injurious to a relationship than one trying to catch the other.
Is there a reason as to why you guys aren't hanging out with that group of friends together? Maybe that would alleviate some of your fears? To see what goes on when he's hanging out with them and stuff...worth a try.
Besides that, I'm interested to know where this fear of yours originates from.