i have like a fear of ripping out my eyelashes with one of those things!! so i do kinda the same thing. When i'm putting on mascara, when i'm done i use my middle finger to push them up. this also sorta smooths out any clumps i get and sometimes separates clupmed together lashes so they look more full.
curlers are ideal, however put your mascara on and wait till its nearly dry to touch but still tacky and using your index fingers press your eye lashes up pressing them in your eye lid. if they are dry enough the wont rub off. hold for 30 secs do this three times and it will work
I never use an eyelasy curler, when your applying your mascara do it slowly and when you get to the middle or edge oof your eyelashes hold the brush there for a minute, this gives the mascara time to dry a bit and helps it hold your eyelashes in that shape.
get a toothpick then heat em. then curl them slowly :) it works for me