Do I need counseling?

About 5 months have passed since the last time I spoke to a counsellor because I had an incident where I tried to hurt myself by drinking loads of pills all at once. I didn’t stop conselling because I didn’t need it anymore but just thought I didn’t. My parents also thought I didn’t really need it. Lately I’ve been thinking and wishing for an accident to happen to me. I don’t have the guts to kill myself but almost tried hurting myself again by drinking loads of pills.

-I’m going to college and doing ok in my lessons but know I can do much better. I’m in a program I’m not sure I like but can’t change because I’ll be changing programs again for the 2nd time and also don’t know what I would change to because I don’t know what I would like to study or am good in. I wish I was studying something I liked and was good in it. -I have a few close friends but wish I had more, and had a better and closer friendship. -I’m alomost 20 years old and have never been in a relationship or even been asked out on a date. Why? There are so many other girls out there that are way worse than I am looks wise, character wise,… and are noticed, liked, loved,… And I know it’s not because I’m shy because again there are other girls out there that are way more shy than I am and are liked,… -There are days where I overeat like crazy. No one has ever seen me. I’m lucky I’m not overweight but better stop this bad habit soon before that starts changing and I start putting on weight. I’ve been trying for a long time to stop but haven’t succeeded. -This is really embarassing to say but I will anyway. There are times where I look for pictures or videos to watch of people kissing, sometimes being naked, and sometimes sex. Only the counsellor I used to talk to knows I do this and thank goodness nobody has ever seen me but it is a terrible habit, millions of times worse than the overeating that I have to stop doing. I’ve been trying for a long time to stop but just can’t. Why? What is wrong with me? I’m crazy. -I should be doing driving lessons and aiming to get my driver’s license because right now I’m depending on my family to take me here and there and don’t have the freedom I would have if I could drive because the public transportation in the place I’m at sucks, and am not as motivated as I wish I was and should be.

These are my major problems that I can’t seem to be able to fix on my own. I’ve been trying and trying. I know I don’t want to kill or hurt myself although I keep thinking about it and it seems like I wish I did, if that makes sense. And I know that the fact that I want to help myself is good but don’t know how. I need counselling don’t I? I shouldn’t have stopped right? How do I tell my parents because they think I’m really happy now and that everything is fine.

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Answer #1

Schools can help, but usually only to a certain degree… They are usually there for quick fixes and dont get involved in long term care… (Im only telling you this because my friend was put off when they insisted on giving her antidepressants, and she never went back…) Try them out though, you may find someone you like talking to But dont get discouraged if you dont like anyone there or if you dont like what they’re saying, I never did…

As for telling your parents, and I can sympathize with you because I still havent discussed anything with mine… but maybe you can just say you’ve been feeling a little depressed, or a little sad, or maybe just that you’re not sure where things are going with your life, maybe you think you need to talk to someone to help you figure some things out… and that you’d like to see a therapist again… You know what words will work best with your parents, but if you dont want to talk specific, try being vague… oh you know I need help sorting stuff out, or I would feel better if I talked to someone… or try third party intervention…(I dont know if this is an option for you…) but get someone else to suggest it…

Answer #2

I’m probably going to have to tell my parents about this because when I used to go to counselling once a week I payed as much as I do for a two hour driving lesson each week. And I certainly can’t have both every week because that’s too much money. I don’t work, my parents are paying for me going to college. I thought maybe balancing it out by driving one week and the next going to counselling and so on because going to counseling every other week is better than nothing, but again they’ll have to find out because I’ll be doing less driving lessons. They’re at me all the time about the whole driving situation because my grandparents are the ones that take me to college and many other places when my parents can’t. I’m hoping my college has counsellors to talk to because then this will be much simpler. The people (friends) I’ve asked so far don’t know so I’m going to ask the people that work at the college to see. But the main thing is how do I tell my parents without having to explain to them in depth all my problems? because they’ll want to know.

Answer #3

Yeah, you need therapy… suicidal ideation is a symptom of depression, and depression can rarely be cured by yourself…

You can change your major as many times as you want, people do it all the time… If you dont know what you like, try taking random things that sound interesting to fill up your electives… People tend to be better at things when they’re interested in them… (and vice versa)

More friends… try meeting more people, sit next to different people in class, get to know your friends’ friends, join a club, activity etc… Usually I stall at the chit chat point. so suggest studying together for a test, say you’re going for coffee or lunch after class ask if anyone wants to come along… also talk about movies… if they say they’ve been wanting to see something, say you have too and ask if they want to go with you… ( I know this can sound daunting, but try repeating this to yourself “what do I have to lose?” if they say no, then they missed out on knowing someone worth knowing, and you try again)

Deeper friendships… I dunno… if you open up to people, they usually reciprocate…

Dating… try the internet ( I dont care how sad people think this is), it is a way to meet people, and you never know, what do you have to lose? also try getting your friends to set you up, and just try to get to know as many people as you can… you’ll find someone eventually…

The overeating is just a bad coping tool… therapy should teach you better ones, and once you deal with what the deeper issue is, and deal with the depression, that might help alleviate it…

Ok, first off, you can say porn, it really isnt a bad word, and it isnt a bad thing… do you know how many people watch porn? do you honestly think all those people are crazy…? (no they’re not all perverted either…) you have a healthy sexuality, dont worry about society’s hypocritical view of it… and definitey dont view it as a problem… now if you’re addicted that’s a different issue, but if you are not spending all your time watching it to the detriment to other areas of your life, I would say you were perfectly normal…

I dont know about the lack of motivation, but there may be a deeper issue behind it… maybe you have a fear of driving? you like having your family take you places because you get to spend time with them? you dont really want that independence because its scary? or maybe you’re just lazy (I suffer from this constantly), and the only way to get over that is just get over it and do what you have to do… remind yourself of the positives that will result in you learning how to drive…

You sit one or both of them down and you tell them that you havent been feeling that great and that you think you should start seeing somone… Its important that you do this soon… (can you imagine how devestated they will be if something happens to you? they’ll forever blame themselves for not noticing you werent doing well)

Atleast see someone at your school councelling center if you dont want to talk to your parents… or call your insurance company and find out what the copay is for going to a therapist… you might be able to bypass your parents entirely…

Answer #4

I dont know if this will help, but could you ask your parents or grandparents to take you out for extra driving practise? I never went to driving school, just took the car out with my dad in parking lots and empty roads… it might be a little more fun, and it will show you parents you are trying…

Answer #5

everybody needs coisiling its good fa ya matter of fact I went to day

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