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Hi guys. I have been with my boyfriend for over a year now. in the beginning of course everthing was fine. it seems as if everything went down hill when he found out that dating a guy he did not like. I knew this before hand and I lied and told him I never did. he holds that over my head like a black cloud. he justifies all his controlling behavior using that as an excuse. I did not cheat on him, it was the past before we hooked up. I have no social life anymore. I have to tell him everywhere I go even if its to the grocery store. he gets upset over small things. sometimes he makes me feel so bad about myself. I am aware that he is controlling but I still put up with it. he is a hyprocrite. he says I can not do certain things but yet he does it himself. he wants me to stay home all the time and go out only with him. he makes it seem as if he does all of this because he cares, but I think its a deeper reason. I can not possibly be the reason he is overly possesive although he blames me. he made me change my number. when I complain he says well if you dont like it then leave. no one is stopping you. even if we argue and its his fault I end up being the bad guy and saying im sorry because I dont want to fight. sometimes its as if he fights with himself and his identity. I dont want to end it. he always tells me that there is no future for us because he can not trust me and it would be bad if we get married because he knows how he is. yet if I even say another boys name he gets angry. he is a little leary on my dressing but not too much. he says he has had a past where he has used physical abuse on his ex because of her cheating I assume. its like he doesnt respect women. every women is a wh&# or a b&%. I dont want to leave him because he does have wonderful qualities. I know I sound like a broken record and vulernable. but he says I provoke this type of behavior in him. sometimes I can be joking and he will take it so seriously and get mad over it. he is not as bad as some of the stories but not any less either. I know it probably wont go anywhere but what can I do to help it get better.
I suggest you leave ...a men tat is over protective and demanding like tat isnt a man to be ...im sure you can do some much better in life if you can find a men that fits you and understands you rather then using U ...I hope you understand where im coming with this ...BUT if you want to still continue threaten that you will leave him if he doesnt cut the crap if he continues leave him for maybe a couple of weeks move in to a friends house ...dont answer non of his call or wats so ever after he attempts to call you the millionth time speak to him see what he has to say . give him another chance if he continues again LEAVE HIM FOR GOOD
Trust me, no one on this entire planet could possibly have enough good qualities to offset the bad ones you have mentioned. Do some reading on abusive husbands and you'll be shocked to see that he has every characteristic of a wife-abuser. I believe your safety is at risk and it could possibly be at risk when you leave him - which you should do fast.
His indoctrination of you has already started.
Does anyone else here think I'm overreacting?
