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I need some help. I am 17 year old adn the only things im able to do is go to school and come home I cant go to my friends house and they cant come here. for some reason my my mom thinks im a bad kids thats ganna turn out like her sister. someone told my mom I was drunk off my @zz at ezmart and I dont even drink I tried to talk to her about it, but all she does is yell. she says he dont care and that she dont like me and that does hurt.I just need to know what to do to get me life and me freedom back. I feel like im on house arrest or something. I dont sleep I barely eat I have chest pains and im really moody. this all happened when she put me on lock down or watever you want to call it, in june. im seriously going insane so please give me some advise
ok, your mum is being quite unreasonable...I mean, I'm strict, but not even I'M THAT strict!
you need to find out where this remour started, and who ever said it, you need to tell them to set your mum straight...
if your sister has been badly behaved, she is probably more frightened that you're going to turn out that way more than anything, believe it or not, and in her mind, she figures that if she has a tight enough leash on you, you can't do anything wrong.
but she needs to remember you're 17..you're not a 13 year old, you're in a position to become more independent...moreover, you should be becoming more independent...
I would try and sort this 'getting drunk issue' first, and then just say to her, I realise you're worried about what you heard, and me not doing well, but you have to give me more freedom...her not letting friends round or not letting you around theirs is unreasonable.
and all the symptoms sound like stress, go to your docs, maybe take your mum, and tell the doctor, say I think I'm getting stressed, this is happening and it's frightening..
is there another adult who you can take with you to talk to your mum? or family member (safety in numbers and all that) but another adult may help, if not, has she got a friends who you couls talk to, who could talk to her and kind of medite between you two?
I know it's really frustrating and annoying and it seems very unfair, but your mum is trying to protect you, and ensure that you reach adulthood as safely as possiblem and not like your sister, who must have caused her concern. I know she's not going about it the right way, but she is doing it the only way she knows how...us parents never get it right bless us, but we do try...
trust me when I say there are people worse off than you.
for starters, as long as you have shelter, food and education, your already better off than half of the world.
secondly, you obviously have freedom, since right now your on the internet. This is a privilege that you have been given.
Im pretty sure that if I heard your mothers side of the story, there would be plenty of valid points in the story as well. You just need communication. Dont get angry, dont yell names, and dont say "Whateva". Just talk.
This should be enough to get you started. When you read this, you have 3 choices: - Accept my view and try as hard as you can to talk and change your attitude towards life. - Take some of my view into account and make your own decision about the rest - or Reject everything I just said even though it has validity. This option shows your pride, and will show your attitude more clearly (in a bad way), so please take at least som of what I said into account.
Unfortunately this is a circle that goes round and round. You want freedom and you dont get it. So you take a little and then your parents will say thats why they have given you freedom. I have a 16 yo daughter in 11th grade. There has been no boyfriend, no sleep over and no extended stays longer then 4 hours at someone house. To me she just hasnt showed she can be trusted on her own. If she still punches her little brother when we say not to how can she hold back anything else in real life. My suggestion as a parent is to slowly show you can be trusted by doing (good things) out of the norm. When parents think you will do the right thing when you arent promted by there screaming we are most likely to trust that you'll make the right and SAFE choice when we arent there. Hope this helps
Jamie in Connecticut
id rather be on the streets than be here I could make it. im the kind of person that likes to get out and do something I hate being stuck at home all the time with nothing to do...
