Do I still have something for the ex?

Ok backstory .. Me and this girl met online through a ‘meet match’ thing on a social network and we got to talking etc and within about 3 months or so we decided to try and see what a long distance thing and I had every intention in going to meet her any time I could. We ended up going out for about 8 months and it was great - I was falling for her but the last few weeks made it to difficult as we both got so busy we might go days at a time with just managing to say hey and sorry been so busy and it was only going to get more like that with both of us being really busy people at home and at college/work etc. the thing was I was unsure to tell her that I am/was trans and it scared the hell out of me that she’d reject it (scared anyone would) and that let me to end it.

We shared so much and seemed great. My family and friends knew about her and hers knew about me, unsure if her parents or older brothers knew much as I knew the men in her family were awfully protective and didnt like how we hadn’t met..

ANYWAY! We drifted with the busy-ness and decided to be friends but I really do miss her, ive recently had dreams with her in them and she pops into my head now and again. I had a not even 3 month relationship and it went down hill fast.

Any insight or anything guys? Please and thank you ..

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Answer #1

Was this your first relationship?

Answer #2

Yes and no, first like official one but I’d had ‘flings’ before hand but nothing serious at all ..

Answer #3

Yes and no, first like official one but I’d had ‘flings’ before hand but nothing serious at all ..

Answer #4

Now that you and she have established a friendship, would you feel safer, safe enough, to reveal more of what you’ve been withholding about yourself? Not as a ploy to change the relationship, but just as a trusting friend who wants to be able to be honestly yourself with her.

Answer #5

Hi Hayyim, I have a lot of respect for you and your knowledge. But, can I say this? You are so politically correct and tolerant of anything and everything that you seem to have no personal convictions. Why? People ask these questions because they are struggling and seeking guidance. Stop accepting everything as “ok” and tell them to quit being stupid.

Answer #6

Hayyim, I apologize for being so crappy to ya last night. I’ve been going through a lot lately and my temper has been a hair trigger…………I’m working on it. I guess the trans and cross dressing types posting lately……….I’m trying to talk em out of it and am not too accepting of the behavior………anyway, sorry for my comment to you, it wasn’t very nice.

Answer #7

As angry put-downs go, yours was pretty darn appreciative of me, lol. I’ve always wondered about the use of “politically correct” as an insult. Why would anyone prefer to be incorrect? I don’t think I’ve been shy about expressing my personal convictions here over the years, but I try not to let them stand in the way of my giving guidance to folks who don’t necessarily share them. Sorry to hear you’ve been so on edge lately. Want to talk about whatever it is you’ve been going through? And regarding your project of trying to talk transsexual people out of their gender dysphoria, to quote a friend of mine, “quit being stupid”! {;^)

Answer #8

Well I try to be respectful…thanks for understanding. Question: What is correct? anything and everything? I tend to think that it has gone too far because people’s lives and state of mind are being destroyed. But thankfully we have that freedom. The double edged sword. The “kids” (boys) struggling with their cross dressing, STRUGGLING. I told them STOP IT and see what happens. The reason I did this is because they already don’t feel right about it or they wouldn’t be asking…..why encourage them to keep doing it which is what everyone else did…………….once again, full and complete tolerance no matter what may not be the solution in every case………….these kids are seeking guidance, not approval necessarily. As for my stuff, (thanks for asking) life changing and profound, might fun mail ya about it sometime when I can communicate better……..:)