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Girlfriend speaks to down to me, screams, calls me all the names under the sun and even puts me down. What to do?
If you're in a relationship like this, here is what you can do to get out of it.
Most people believe that they cannot leave a situation for many reasons. In fact, the hardest reason is generally if there is some financial dependence or having a place to live. But in most cases, the reason is emotional and this can be more powerful than the possibility of being homeless.
If the reasons are not financial, realize you can leave.
We have all heard of stories of people in abusive relationships who don't leave because they're afraid their partner cannot cope without them.
But really, this is just your mind finding excuses for not leaving the relationship.
A big reason for not leaving abusive relationships is because the abused person thinks that they are in love. This is just a warped idea of what love is.
Usually it's some kind of infatuation. But it's not love at all.
Love is making a partner's live better -- not telling them that you love them or just a feeling.
Generally you want to leave then the other person is not around. You also do not want to tell them you're laving or leave any signs that you will leave.
1. Have a place to go to
2. Decide what personal possessions you need to take
3. Figure out how long it will take you to pack
4. Plan on packing and going when the other person is not at home
When you leave, just leave. Don't leave any notes. Don't make any calls or send any texts. Don't post anything on social media. Just leave and go to your next location.
Do not start any conversations with the abuser. Don't answer their calls. Delete their chats. Block them on social media. If possible, don't say where you went to anyone.
Starting a conversation or answering texts, or even making them see that you read their message, is always an invitation for them to keep contacting you.
If you somehow got back in contact with the abuser and they begged you to go back. Don't fall for it.
In almost all cases, the abuse became worse when the abused person goes back to live with the abuser.
Finally, try to get some help from a therapist or counsellor.
You might think that this abuse is your fault, but you were just a person that fell under the spell of the abuser. In most cases there are abuse hotlines in your area. A quick google will get you some help.
