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Okay..here it is. My boyfriend's mother hates me! She is the most obnoxious cry baby of a mother you will ever meet! I have tried so hard to get her to like me. I have now just given up.
Here's the story... My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 2 1/2 years and we are about to be engaged. When we started dating, his mom was nice. We are in college and we decided we would eat at a restaurant where we attend college and have our parents meet each other. This was like 4 months in to our relationship. You could tell she was skeptical of me, but that's anybody when they first meet someone. Me and my mom tried to talk to her and she proceeded to be short with us. I really didn't care. I thought she would warm up to me later.
It is now 2 1/2 years in and she still hates me! She will do everything in her power to not give me the time of day. I gave up this years Thanksgiving to prove to my boyfriend that I will do anything to marry him. I am a huge family girl and leaving my family for his was really hard to do. We got to his house and she had been "crying" all morning! And of course he hugged her for like ten minutes trying to console her. After that, she left to the bedroom and didn't come out til about 20 minutes later and never said Hi. That really upset me. I don't know what to do anymore. She tried to apologize when she called my BOYFRIENDS phone, not MINE! She knew I had told him about what she did and now she was apologizing to him, not me. Other than this, I sent her a Christmas gift, and engraved candle and I didn't get anything in return. I'm not looking for a gift, but a thank you would be nice. I'm just really upset because I can only imagine what it will be like when we are engaged. She's done numerous amounts of other ridiculous things but lately it really has started to bother me.
What do I do!?
Hey , I no what you are going through its ridiculous my boyfriend also father of our 2 year old is a mammas boy. we been together for 3 years and known eatchother since we were 8 years old. I thought his mom and I were okay until mother foud out we were dating and I was pregnant she showed up at my house and took me to mc donalds and was talking to me about how me and her son our going to ruien our lives but she gave birth to my boyfriend when she was 19 aswell! she also talked about abortion and even had the audacity to verbally tell me an abortion clinics address, after the talk she told me not to tell her son, but of course I did. His mother never liked me, she hates me and there is no logical reason, shes says its because when I used to come over I would say hi to her but not start a conversation, which is false because we've had confersations before..I think its cause “i took her son from her” she talks a lot of crap to her family members about me and does anything and everything in her will to keep her son away from me by telling him how I will leave him for someone better looking with more money and how im a bad influence to him and will get him in trouble one day, how im rude and im going to be a bad house wife because I wouldnt clean his room. thats not my job expecially if its your house and his room. she calls him more then I do and she always wants him to go everywhere with her or help her out all the time, mind you she has a husband and a younger son and daughter. dont no why all her attention is set on her son and my life, more then her own family! this women has even went out of her way to introduce my boyfriend to her friend that is 21 and would say how she likes her better and how the girl reminds her of herself when she was her age, and how she says she is a nice girl unlike me. my boyfriend does not stand up for me he stands up for her and her negativity, there was an incodent where she thought she new more about parentig and trying to tell us what to do, my daughter was 4 months old at the time and she would let her sleep on her tummy over night when she babysat and I told her I was not comfertable with that and she hung up on me, so when we went over to her house to pick up my daughter she started yelling at me and it got to the point where she came out of no where and tried to choke me like WTF!! and she has the nerve to go around telling people that im crazy or psycho, she hates the fact that we are together and I just dont understand it..im getting sick of her and my boyfriend not sayin anything, she treats him like hes 12 years old and we are both 23. any how girl I deff feel your pain and all I can say is YOU shouldnt be the one to confront her or apologize your man needs to grow up and defend his women because his mother is wrong and she needs to let go of her grown son and encourage her son to be with you and be a good father and boyfriend/husband to you. very disrespectfully it sickens me
I'm in a similar relationship; engaged to a man I've been with for 3yrs and still hasn't cut the cord from mommy. Here's the thing, his mommy doesn't hate you; she's jealous of you. If your fiance is a mama's boy, then his mother has always been 1st - no matter what! And there probably was never another girlfriend that she had to worry about being so serious...then you come along?! Now, your not just a come and go girlfriend anymore you're going to be his wife & in her mind ... the girl who takes her son away from her! In my opinion; it feels worse than hate sometimes. I hate to tell you this, but if you can't accept it (all of it)how he seems to be ok with her behavior and doesn't really get upset with her - but may find it easy to get upset with you for always bringing it up (don't know; just guessing)... you may really want to re-think this whole thing. As I said, I'm in a very similar situation and it's very hard. To love someone so much , you want to spend your life with them; but you don't know if you can really live forever with a mama's boy?! All I can say is, good luck... talk to him ( I mean a real talk, it's all or nothing) ... continue to be nice to his mother (no matter what happens; in the end he'll know you were the bigger & better person)... don't be afraid to let him know when something is bothering you (tell him you love him but you need him to know this isn't right & you deserve better) ... but always remember;the most important thing in all this is ... there is a BIG chance it will NEVER change! Best of luck to ya!
My grandparents hate my mother. They've been married 26 years. Not much you can do about this. Stop expecting. Stop expecting her to like you. Stop expecting her to say thank you. Stop expecting common courtesy. Just stop expecting. And talk to your fiance. Because you're right. This is not going to get better once your married. So decide. If he doesnt change, can you deal with him being the way he is with his mother? Because if you cant, then maybe this isnt the right relationship for you. As for his mother, let it go. B*tchy mother-in-laws dont change.
There isnt much you can do your going to have to get your boyfriend to talk to her and for him to tell her your not ok with this. My mom is the same way she didnt like my girlfriend so I went up and told her straight that its not ok that I love her and she would hve to learn to be ok with that and now everything is fine.
