Sex after marriage?

Darling you’re not going to go straight to hell if you have premarital sex… okay?…

OK, I see your point.

Not having sex before marriage is one of the more ridiculous religious rules.

Everyone should absolutely have sex before marriage to make sure you are compatible. To think that people should wait is completely ludicrous, and will never happen universally.

Don’t let the zealots scare you.

Keep in mind that the same people who brought us the idea that there is a god who obsesses over our sex lives, also thought slavery was just fine, and that you should kill rebellious children.

Don’t let ancient superstitions dominate your life.

What happens if you don’t marry him…will you keep getting into sexual relationships and think it’s ok because you think you will get married to the person…it’s a circle …and we use it as an excuse I’m afraid.

When I was a Christian, part of repenting had to do with changing your behavior. You aren’t going to find a loophole to trick God, so you can’t “take advantage” of God. Just don’t do anything that would make you feel guilty. That was a good rule of thumb for me as a teen.

? We don’t sleep around andyburton. I was just asking if we’d be sent to hell.

and ashley14, I do but how much repenting could the Lord take? I don’t want to make him feel I’m taking advantage of him.

just repent and ask the lord to forgiveness.

In my opinion, having pre-maritial sex will not get you sent to Hell because if it did, then a lot of people would be in Hell just for this one sin, not counting all of the other sins that you try not to committ.

all you have to do is ask for forgiveness and mean it in your heart then you wont go to hell thats why jesus came to save us all from going to hell so just ask god for forgivness!!!

If you repent to god and know what you did was wrong and TRY than ANYTHING is forgivable!! thats why jesus dies for usa on the cross– so we could all be forgiven! Just repent, LOVE HIM, and TRY thats all jesus asks! Even if you don’t end up marrying that person- don’t waste your life just because you had sex with them before marriage- GOD is a very merciful god!

god bless

Well, are you Catholic or Protestant, first off? Because Catholics really buy into penance and such. In which case, I suppose if your priest tells you you’re a hopeless case, you’ll have to take his word for it.

But if you’re Protestant, as long as you’ve accepted Jesus, not much can get you sent to Hell. Salvation is unconditional, and can’t be lost or regained, unless you no longer accept Jesus.

But regardless of religion, I’m pretty sure that, short of going on a killing spree or something, you won’t go to Hell. So no worries. Then again, I tend to be a bit looser on my interpretations of what gets you into Hell to begin with.

Its not just the sex, and maybe compability is not the right term. It is an ability to be intimate together. I am sure there are lots of people who wait to have sex, and I am sure many of them are happy. I am not saying to be promiscuous, and have sex with many people, or to do it immediately with a new partner. But I also think sex is such a strong urge, that people who want to wait might rush into marriage, and then find out they made a mistake. I just think sex is a very important part of a growing relationship, and not something that should be put off for years.

I have to tell you, jimahl, that I didn’t need to have sex with my husband before I realised that we were going to be ‘sexually compatible’. The pheremones were enough, I suppose! 20 years on I still feel faint thinking of how we met…

I’m not that experienced in terms of sexual partners, but I honestly don’t understand this issue of ‘sexual compatability’ anyway - if you are friends and in love and commited for life then you are going to make sex work, surely?

Omg people. WE’RE NOT OBSESSED WITH SEX! Holy f* And yes, we’re right for eachother and planning to MARRY! I’ve been with him for over 5 years. Read my question and figure it out.

I just asked a simple question.

Just answer yes or no and a little comment. Don’t put other reccomendations in your post that you don’t even address to yourself!

Anyways, thanks you guys (ESPECIALLY SILVERWING & FLOSSHEAL WHO HAD THE MOST REASONABLE ANSWERS).

God knows when youre taking advantage of him, taking advantage is when you say sorry but then turn around and do it again then repent and go back repent, etc. you wont as it has been said as long as you repent BUT it has to be TRUE repentance and that you are really saved (im not saying that youre not I just sayin, ya know making a point to others). true repentance is the key but afterwards you shouldn keep going back doin it over and over again. hope this helps :)

You know what, that’s between you,your boyfriend and God. If you guys are being convicted then try not to put yourselves into lustful temptations. Have an honest think on whether the relationship has been built on sex…it will survive if it wasn’t…test yourselves. Sex is not a bad thing in itself…God did create us to be attracted to one another in that way…and the bible urges us to marry if we can’t control our lust. But sex was meant to be enjoyed in a marriage covenant …

Christians believe that you go to hell if you haven’t asked Jesus to be your Saviour and your Lord. We don’t believe you will go to hell if you do X, why or Z… it’s about a personal relationship or a lack of it.

Once you have that personal relationship with Jesus, Christians believe you are not going to hell. Does this mean you can ‘take advantage’ of that relationship of forgiveness? Of course not, as a number of astute people are saying above.

Some people are answering as if they think you are looking for excuses to have sex: ‘We’re going to get married, so that’s OK’. I bet they’ve made those excuses themselves - I certainly have! So if that’s the way you’re thinking about it, don’t feel bad, because most of us have tried that on God at some point. But it doesn’t mean it’s right.

The guy I was definitely going to marry isn’t the one I ended up marrying. We were together from the ages of 15 to 18, which is quite a long time, and a lot of people expected us to get married, including us. But it didn’t happen, and I wasn’t wise to use that excuse. I’m not going to hell because of it, because I’ve accepted Jesus as my Saviour and my Lord. But my life, and my subsequent relationships, were a bit messed up by it. At least I didn’t get pregnant…

Get married to that person if they’re the right one for you! Don’t get married to try to save yourselves from going to hell or whatever - you’d probably end up in the living hell of a pointless marriage instead. Silverwings’ advice is good on that.

Ok then, “no”.

Agreed, just get married to the person and don’t concern yourself with the part about the eternal damnation.