How can I my family to accept me?

Have you attempted to explain to them that it hurts your feelings / makes you mad ? Or you can attempt to explain to her what ‘emo’, ‘skater’ and ‘gothic’ actually mean in modern society, and why you don’t like to be categorised.

As for the lip piercings / boyfriends, your profile says you’re 13 - a lot of parents are quite controlling of their daughters life at this young age. I wasn’t allowed to date anyone until I was 16. It may be that she has stereotyped ideas about other races, and that could contribute to why she doesn’t want you to date then. To be honest, dating shouldn’t worry you right now since you’re only very young. It is extremely unlikely that it would develop into something ‘serious’.

I’m 18 now and I think my mother would still want to rip a lip piercing if I came home with it. You may find that as you grow older, she becomes more open to these suggestions.

Also your dad sounds much more reasonable in regards to not caring about the race of who you date. Perhaps you could attempt to talk about it with him. He might be able to say something to your mother about it, as well as ask them to stop calling you ‘emo’, ‘skater’ or ‘gothic’.

Just don’t lose your cool with your family, you don’t want to get into trouble. Parents have a hard time understanding their children. They’ve probably heard all these terms in the media and been told that they are ‘bad’ etc, hence why they don’t want you to fall into these categories.

[ NOTE: Not saying these categories are ‘bad’, I’m just saying the media often picks on them].

I explained to her that is does hurt my feelings me she just ignores me. And i attempted to tell her what emo,skater, and gothic actually are but once again she ignored me.

My parents were like this, and they dont like me dating out of my race but then say theyre not racist even though they make alot of racist comments! I wouldnt know what to suggest appart from just carry on the way you are. You might grow out of it you might not, I used to be ‘skater’ kinda thing when I was your age but Im completely the opposite now. Im like a Tall Bimbo Diva always wearing heels! When I look back at pics of me I just think eww, why did my mum let me dress like that? So in a sense shes right I suppose unless you’re gunna be like this for life.

Most parents have this ‘ideal’ for their kids. They want what’s ‘best’ for them. And sometimes, when they notice that this ideal isn’t going in the direction that they would like it to, they kinda freak out and try to get it back on track by doing or saying certain things. I remember when I was younger my mom would not let me get a second ear piercing because she thought it would be like me acting out or something as stupid as that. As I grew older, she refused to let me get a tattoo because she thought that people wouldn’t respect me in the same way as if I didn’t have one. In my eyes that made little sense but she insisted that there would come a day when I’d regret it. I haven’t gotten to that day yet and I don’t know if I will, but the point is that parents have a hard time accepting new things, especially if they know little about it. You are young and want to be ‘in’ with the rest of the crew but as you grow older you will find that your taste in things will change. I’m not saying that you should not experience things but be careful what you do with/to your body because some things can’t be reversed.

Ignore what she says about a blonde child. You have about 10 or more years before you have to deal with that. Don’t stress over it now.

You cannot change your mother just like she can’t change you. You will need to find a way to accept her as she is and learn to deal with it even if it hurts your feelings and is really annoying!

You cant. If there’s one lesson in life you need to learn it is that you cannot MAKE anyone do anything. Nothing you do will make someone do anything. People are individuals and they make decisions to do things. We all want our parents to love and accept us exactly the way we are. It doesnt happen. There are few parents in this world who can accept their kids without criticizing them at least some of the time. If your mother is calling you names, names that dont actually mean anything, then what difference does it make. Let it go. Basically what you’re saying is, I want my mother to see things my way. But you refuse to look at things her way. I’m not saying she is right. Just that you’re both doing the exact same thing. So, stop trying to make her agree with you. Because it isnt going to happen. Be ok with who you are. Whether or not your mother accepts it. She may come around eventually. But it will be at her own pace and her own time. Right now, you’re 13. She gets to decide whether you have a lip ring or not. She decides who she wants you to date. When you’re 18, all you have to say is, this is who I am, you can accept it or not, but you cant change it. And then go do and be your own person. For a little while, you’re going to have to stick it out. And listen. People only pick on those who react. If you stopped reacting to the names, they would lose interest and stop calling you names.

Me and my parents still struggle to this day on my physical apperance. They think I am a great mother, wife, and friemd but they wish I would look what they call normal. They accept my unique qualities but they still make comments. Not hurtful ones just advice on what they think. my sister is a beauty queen, no joke, but a bad person. I have been trying to help my parents understand that its what is inside a person that counts not the outside apperance. Over time when you grow out of many phases you will go threw your true self and style will come out. After some time your mom may learn to acceot it and maybe she wont. Just be true to yourself and dont let others push you into things or make you umcomfortable with yourself. Best of luck!