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Hey everyone, please bare with me and read this whole thing ! So let me give you a little info. My 43 year old dad got maried to his 38 year old new wife two months ago. Up until now her three kids have been living with there dad, but now that school has started they are living with us. (there dad gets them for summer time, mom for the school year) I had met them before and they were okay , but now I cant stand them! byrce is cool, he does his own thing for the most part and hes nice when hes around me. but shelley and alison. they are so fuc*king crazy! they keep stealing my stuff. they even shaved my cats fur of some places! they ruin everything they take. they barge into my room all the time to bug me. we share a bathroom so they use all of my shampoo and stuff. they leave it filthy. both my dad and my step mom work a lot. so they dont realy see it happpen! I have no idea what to do! please help me!
there ages are: Sheley ~ 8 Alison ~ 13 Bryce ~ 16
ok...the cat thing is totally out of order! I would point out that it's not hurting you, but it is cruel to the cat...I'm quite vindictive, so I would take a picture of the cat a bit shaved, stick a bit of ketchup or fake blood on the cat and send it to al her friends to let them know how much of an evil cow she's being!!...but I probably shouldn't recomend that, since that won't help, but it would make you feel better!
ok, the 16 boy, he's cool then, yeah? he would be, he's a boy living in a house with 3 hormonal girls (I'd keep a low profile too lol!!)
and the girls, well, they're being spiteful girls! it's actually quite normal...are you an only child? if you are, this must have come as a HUGE shock to you! seriously..all of a sudden it's the brady bunch gone wrong!
and girls are often harder to tame than boys...they're more willfull!
personally, I'd write a note to my dad, it's obvious you don't get a lot of time alone with him, so give him a note on his way to work, so he has some time to digest what you're saying...new relationships where children are involved is always VERY difficult, especially when the children are older...
just becuase your step mum and dad work, that's no excuse for ignoring what's going on in the home...you are all both their responsibility now...and part of you all being able to co-habit is communication and more important BOUNDARIES!!!
in the note I would say, dad, I know you have ??? now and she makes you really happy, and I'm really glad your happy again with her. but I'm sad, I feel violated in my own home, my privacy gets constantly invaded and the girls are cruel to me...emphasise you really didn't want to do this, but you don't know what to do anymore. you've tried getting on with them, and they don't seem to want to accept you...
you need to recognise that your dad probably doesn't feel like he has a duristiction over her children, but he's SO wrong! you all live in the same house, this isn't about her kids and his kids, this is about 6 people living in a house!
but you need to look as innocent as possible...be sickenly nice, ask them if they'd liek to do things with you. work out the 8 year old, there's the weak link there...what does she like to do? get HER on your side...make friends with her etc...sheley is at an age where she wants to feel part of something, just make sure YOU'RE that something...it's not malicious...but once alison sees that bryce and shelley have both accepted you and get on with you, her little army will be looking very weak!!
it's not palying dirty, it's about making another allie...and at the moment, there is a war going on...allision and shely may never accept you, but as long as you can say 'I've tried really hard' then you can't be held to blame!
where's your mum by the way?
hehe yesh unfortunately it happens... siblings.I am the oldest of 5 and one of the most important things is to be patient, respectful and sneaky. Tell the two younger ones that you don't like them stealing your things without yelling at them maybe sit them down and talk to them at eye level. It gives them some feeling of control and importance without diminishing you. Sometimes this works other times it doesn't it depends on the kid.
Make sure you treat them like you want to be treated and maybe give them a little attention once in a while (hey let's play a game or paint your nails). This makes them see you in a more friendly tone and they might think otherwise when they reach for the shampoo. You can also try to relate to them if they're having trouble with school/friends/boys maybe you can share some advice or share stories eventually.
Now being sneaky is not used for revenge but for your things that you don't want to be taken. Find a spot where they can't reach or put your bath items in a little basket (which is very nice to use in college later on) and keep that in your room.
You can also ask your parents about a lock on your door. They might disagree but why not ask come up with logical reasons you should have a lock and explain it to them that way.
Another important rule is not to react. Usually siblings act badly or push your buttons for attention. Don't yell at them. Call them over quietly using a calm voice and explain to them slowly what they did was upsetting to you and ask them not to do it again. This will have a more profound affect on them rather than yelling.
And siblings will always be annoying but they can also be some of the best people you've ever met. I hope this helps some. Much love and hope for good fortune!
tell them to back off so what if they cry and dont let anyone see or here you let yur step bro do his own thing and when he get sout of the house for a while, let your parents get out of the house for work and when your like babysitting them or somethin tell them they will get in trouble and say it until they cry and when your parents cry tel them you didnt do it they hit their heads on the door lol itl work trust me oh and before you do any of that~ be an angel dont yell, dont scream just put up with it then seize yur perfect chance and good luck lol
um... I don't know maybe you can become friends to your new step bro & have him help you control them lol or try spending time with them getting to know them the change maybe hurt them & there taking there anger & sadness out on you try sitting them down & asking them how do they feel about you being there new sister & let them know your there for them if they need anything etc. I hope I've helped you with this siblings can be a real pain I have 3 too :)
Simply a Rose to brighten your day, And maybe lessen the cares in your way; And also, too, to help you to know, That in knowing you, many others grow!
I would suggest that you take the time to write down ALL your grievances and then see if you can get your dad to have a FAMILY meeting where ground rules can be set.
It's going to be about communication and mutual concern and respect for each other.
