What are the best excuses to get out of work sick?

What excuses are the best for getting off of work sick? I have a bunch of work and I can't afford to go to my regular job, but they won't just let me have the day off. Need excuses to give to be sick or something for work.

Food Poisoning is always a good one. The key is if you know you are going to miss a day. Call or email the night before and set the trap. Tell them at like 9 or 10pm that you have been sick since you got home and are not sure if you can make it. Then the day of, you call again. This always works the best since you are following up the day of.

east just say I have a family reuion my dad had dieid and I need to get there fast

Tell them you discovered a strange portal with what appeared to be Egyptian heiroglyphics around it's perimeter. In trying to decipher the writing you accidentally actuated the device which then teleported you through a worm hole to the far end of the galaxy. When they start asking questions tell them the reception on your mobile is extremely bad and you expect to be in tomorrow.
This is very believeable but you may only be able to use this excuse once or twice at the most.

how about becoming a felon then you won't have to worry about that job you don't want to go to

how about becoming a felon then you won't have to worry about that job you don't want to go to